So. I'm sitting outside. Possibly suffering dehydration and tolerating wind that feels like Satans ass gas for the simple fact that I am running away from laundry. AKA: Being an adult. Plus, I'm stressing about the whole getting older thing. To the point that I may be experiencing a mental breakdown. Within five minutes, I thought of some of the most absurd and hilarious mind-pickings. We'll see how good or bad this could be. I present to you, from the mind of a sunburnt and lazy, quite assuredly retarded Shay..."WTF Was I Thinking.."
1. Damn it's hot. Swamp-ass season. Swamp hunters...ass crocodiles. Wait...bungus gators!
2. A gator couldn't survive this swamp ass.
3. Man, I need...uh...a drink.
4. (Back inside staring at the dryer like its a slutbag pariah, while eating Cheetos) I could be like Chester and rub my fingers all over the clean clothes. Dickbag left a half can of Copenhagen in his pants and it got washed. Cheetos May be an improvement. Stick a pin in this and think of cons.
5. I need to get my brother to use the clippers on my neck. God damn Italian werewolf genes. "Wolfman has nards!" (If you know what that's from, I'll lick your eyeball)
6. *sings Bohemian Rhapsody in its entirety*
You be the judge on just how far my cheese has slid off the cracker.
