3 in a 2 man race's blog: "little dittys"

Her name? Undisclosed, but she had this tale of woe... Trust, was for her, was oh heck no.. This would be her downfall or heel of achilles.. her heart was cold,..her stare? Indeed chilly!.. This would be her portrait, but then I'd discover.. I was only one,..and there was another.. I could question why but I'd get no answer.. Should I love or leave,...I'd get no answer,, Some say love is a seed and from it a rose.. Have I love's seeds? The world may never know.. Of my pain,..of my plight.... my risings late at night..... Far be it,....i must complain,... of the host with the undisclosed name... I suppose her''s was an episode of unbridled lusts.. He was jovial and carefree,..musts was enough.. Listen,..I'd suppose you'd listen, but to whom do I speak? Love was given away to him last week.. Ah,. to dispair,. allude to I don't care.. Only to be caught unawares,...somewhere out there.. Leave or stay? Love is still gone away... Its meticulous to go on,..on a day to day.. So,..deceite does lurk in the heart of a bethrothed.. Nevermind, I thought you knew her,..she was undisclosed.. -sk-

Blissfull Sleeping, Joyous Leaping, Loves in season, and I'm fiending. I'm ready to elope, so what's the scope? I'll say yes at best, but she sez nope. Dang you cuss, where is your trust? What's happened to us? that's enough. Its enough to make you say whats the use. then she wears a skirt, and we're back to work. Kisses on lips, touching of fingertips You'll miss the lovemaking only if you dip. Lintuous touch, lust corrupts Its more i'll fuss, incredible stuff. Check yourself, you'll wreck yourself,. you tryin to get me, but you'll get yourself.. I'm a romance pusher.yeah boy she's a looker. you know she's a hooker, like Chuckie Booker. Oh? How would I know? You can ask Joe. If you got that cash she can make it last. Even myself, I had to rise above her I had to cut her, and run for some cover. She told me she loved me, but when it was over I peeked over my shoulder, her smile grew colder thus grew her fame, a lustful game everything to lose, nothing to gain. Friends say "You Dummy!" Me? I think its all funny But its not funny, when its your money. I cant even call a cab because she got half. whoo, i'd better stop, before i get too hot. Off the cuff,. romance is getting tough. You're wishing for a lover and getting nothing but trouble. You're busy tryin to make her holler. and all she's wantin is your dollar. you can say im hating if you wanna. but im a loner, and a long goner. Deep Introspect, a product of neglect .and what you get is no respect, attitude.Just plain out rude. but if you go to court there's child support Its insane, other than mundane. It'll make you take a cane and beat out your brains. You flirt with death, so watch your step if you lose your health they'll be no one to help. hey you wanted the truth, now you have proof you can whistle with glee this melody. And amid all this ruckus you'd retain structure and your chosen lover would retain her luster. But she is lost to me, this search is costing me but my appetite is whet, im going in debt. Its just to see her, my God I need her! But as that thought is concieved, am i filled with greed. I want her for me and for me only. and like i told you before, only the lonely. can play, so is this a game?

Early Lore A Confessions Supplement The Tale of Mrs. Toe’mas I’ve written this tale once before, but with a late season hurricane coursing the oceans; I’ve decided to reweave the story of Mariya Thomas, or Mrs. Toe’mas as I affectionately call her. Let us turn back the years to a time when I had begun documenting the journals on a semi annual basis. It was well within 1988. Deetra was detestful and her occasional phone calls were the closest I had to a relationship at that point in life. I had just received news that I was one of the finalists of the All State Chorus that year. Life was looking up. I was gaining respect among my peers… Ok, that may have been a stretch but one way or another I met a young voluptuous woman with long hair walking towards the music building. She wore these cute glasses but her best feature was her long luxurious hair. I was enthralled, I was consumed with passion, I told a joke and that pretty much was it for a while. It was her friend Cassandra that alerted me that I could actually talk to her. I think it was her who first gave me her number. But with stipulations, I remember her step-folks were kinda strict. No phone calls after 8 I believe. So, with Cassandra as my medium, we conversed the first night. December never felt warmer. School let out for Christmas break and I remember Mariya discussing some band trip that she would be going on. She’d go of course I’d miss her. But there were a couple of things to happen of note during Mariya’s absence; on December 31st I received a phone call from Keisha Boyington. I still to this day don’t understand why she had called. It was the last time I’d hear from her, so I figure it was a turning point in her life. I know it was for me. Later on that night, at our concert at the skating rink, this unknown girl gave me a New Year’s kiss. Don’t ask me who she was, I’d like to think she was someone who recognized the budding Knight and wanted to lay the ground work for the chaos that ensued for the coming year. 1989 had come in with a bang. But I had guidance, I had a girlfriend. I began to forsake all others. I could not wait to get back to school to see her. I was among the first few weeks of January that me and Mariya shared our first and only kiss. It was between classes right in front of the music building. (Ya’ll can’t begin to understand the connection that me and that ole music building share.) This was fuel for the conversation that we all shared. Cassandra had found her a boyfriend and I teased her mercilessly of course. And every thing was fine or seemed as so. February had rolled around and then, February was a sinister month for me. It was always a reminder of the fact that the knight went still unloved. But this year was different, me and Mariya was an item. As a matter of fact, let me get her a candy gram or something for Valentines Day. I remember meeting her at her locker for some sugar first (heh! Like that ever happened…) but I asked her did she want any thing for Valentine’s Day. I didn’t have a job or anything, but it shouldn’t be a problem to come up with the five bucks that it took for balloons and candy. Someone would sympathize with young love. Well she told me no. I shouldn’t be bothered with such shenanigans. So I’d done exactly what she said. I didn’t bother. How surprised was I when I saw her with at least 30 bucks of balloons and candy (every year that number increases). I think I broke up with her after the phone call, Wait she broke up with me because I accosted her. Swearing she was with someone else. Of course she didn’t need me. She had somebody. Cassandra called me and told me I was wrong. I was. I called back and wished to be her friend. She allowed it. Since then Mariya became the trusted soul. She even helped me out when I was dealing with her “cousin” Robynetta. She was even a mediator between me and the Beasely-woman when we called it quits. 1991 I hate to tell this part of the story because I was wrong. But here it goes; I called Mariya and conversed, I found out that Mariya needed a date for the prom. I don’t know who suggested I would do it, but I was honored. I never went to my prom. I felt if we went, there would be sparks, and we would restart what had been stopped ages ago. It probably would’ve been wonderful. But the fates had it that I would screw up the transportation. My brother and his car were in Columbia that weekend. What could I do? I hid. Everyone was expecting me to call. My mom’s glared at me knowing I was in the wrong. That’s when the phone calls began. Ugh! It was an ugly night for the budding Knight indeed. I still feel the apprehension and disappointment from that night. I had unwittingly bruised Mrs. Toe’mas’s heart. She didn’t want to talk to me again. Tracee didn’t want to talk to me ever again. My brother called me back and said “Why didn’t you say something earlier?” The world to me was a cruel lover. I wouldn’t speak to her for eleven months. A hole developed in the middle of my persona. Within that hole; a defensive vengeance seeker emerged. But Mariya wasn’t his target. So when I saw Mariya and Tracee at the local Spring Fling, I prepared to engage in a battle. There was none. I finally talked to Mariya, well, she talked to me. She said she doesn’t really know what happened that night, nor did she want to know. But she felt she had to do something. I asked what it was. She wanted to slap me. She didn’t. But you know she wanted to. Her look in her eye told me all I needed to know. She looked sympathetic and I probably looked pathetic. I left with my dignity intact, but you could tell something was broken. It was the close friendship we had. 1992 A letter went out to Mariya. I never know if she had got it or not. But I requested forgiveness for all that I had done. Mariya taught me that a woman’s heart can hurt. Even at the hands of the most well meaning of hearts. She taught me to be careful.

Confessions of a West-EnderWith east-end girls Yuletide season once again. Some people say it has a magic all its own. I call it the Christmas spirit: the wish/urge to get something for Christmas. My urge has been satisfied already. The one known as the Beasely woman has captivated the slumbering knight once again. A timeless rift to the core of my being now fires with ancient energies, for I am once again hers! Updates: Shirley Ann has shrugged off the title of girlfriend because of news that I may perhaps become Trese’s baby-daddy. This is unofficial word. So do not take such to heart. Felicia Michelle Holmes is also stating that I am the true father of her first born. This is horrendous. Tango Katrina? She has no hope of sustaining or maintaining me. Her fatal flaw was baby daddy. Ugh! Unusually festive, I realize that this euphoria might be short lived. But pardon me as I bask in this glow. -> I have yet to catch wind about a certain Jeraldine though. I’ve got to remain on guard. -> This has happened before. A single phone call has escalated/propelled Tracee Marvel to the number one spot… again. If this is short lived then the reason would because of that other lover she has. Dag! That should’ve been me. I should’ve been that crutch for her. But I think she did it the way she wanted to. I think she could’ve had it much easier. Remember this one reigned over my heart for seven years. So why wouldn’t I want to make it easy on her, aren’t I her knight? 1997 The year in review Last year was average. Mediocre relationships dominated the horizon. I’ve once lamented who has that oompf to subject myself to their cause, the return was perhaps I am in the wrong place for romantic endeavors. This place seems filled with carnal induced passions. I withstood most of these hurricane force winds, but I did falter. Jeraldine still remains queen of my heart. But Tracee Marvel lurks amazingly close, and may overthrow the upstart, But only time will tell. Nobility is still within my grasp. I’d forsaken all unworthy forbearers, and there is passion within me too prolific to be documented here. Andrea was lost at the hands of the incensed lover. Mirian, ah, sad to say she is lost to the world. Tango has me now, but this is only temporary. I require more than what she offers. Tansha was confounded in her own passions. Neither of these were what I call ‘righteous’, and I could not find ‘righteous’, I couldn’t even find ‘ok’. What could I expect though, when there was no one here to help, and no one to get involved?

Ah, it was the spring of 1991. I was just settling in good from my basic training in the USMC reserves. This was the year I was to reacquire the Beasely woman, but that had yet to transpire. What was happening was a hand full of teenagers calling me. It could have been worse, believe me. So, after much debate (Ha!), Andréa began to occupy my phone time. During this time, I was purely a monster of my own desires and loved every minute of it. April 4th rolls around and I receive a phone call from a now single Monica Jordan. I knew of her because her former boyfriend was my cousin Demarcus. We talk about nothing too much. I pass the phone off to my younger brother. After a short conversation though my younger brother, we was invited to a party at Monica’s dad house. When the day of the party comes, we are the only guests. I don’t know if it was planned that way or not. The only thing I know is there is free cake and soda to be had, and I partook on the fun in spite of the lack of guests. I recognized that Monica was flirting with me, so I flirt back and it was well received. Ed. Notes: Tim said she was flirting with him too, but he had to go home; Tim was upset, but he was no longer in charge of the situation. My alter ego had roared into conscious thought. Meager carnal passions were cited. I spent the night on fire. I was shall we say, interested! Now all this time it had not occurred to me to ask her age. She had carried herself like a teenager should have. So it wasn’t until the next week when a field trip to her house unannounced, gave me the shock of my life. I knocked on the door, and her mom pops her head out and announces that Monica was not to have company. Not completely undaunted, I went on about my way. It wasn’t until next week is when we get to stay a while. Needless to say, her mother wasn’t home, and you know what happens when girls are home with a boyfriend alone? Yes, media hype, and all this was going on amid Andrea’s undoing. It actually became annoying. But that’s another story. My younger brother was dismayed for he thought Monica had some kind of relationship with him. They did spend a lot of undue time on the phone because my time was being occupied with the band and super Nintendo. But this wasn’t the scandal. I found out she was only fourteen!! I learn this the second time I visit her house. Her dad really didn’t give any clues on the situation while I was over there. I suppose he didn’t care about how old I was at the time, but mom on the other hand, was asking me what school I attended. A quick lie satisfied a curious nature. I glance at the deceptive one and asked what school do you attend? A middle school was the answer. Logic reasoning had it that I accept the consequences and leave, but heart had other plans. I had already given her the benefits of doubt. So we continued on, but with reservations. This would become arrested on the 18th of April. She would find out about Andrea’s phone calls and I proceed to get brow beaten. I try to convey that we no longer talk, but this would fall upon deaf ears. Andrea and Monica had discussed me openly and decided I should be punished. After this confrontation Monica had a problem with possession. The only reason I could think of is that she thought that me and Andrea still had something going on. This was far from the truth, for by this time Pamela E.M. VanEisJden and Kamika had my full attention. And even during all this, Robynetta friendliness was distracting. With all this attention I was getting, I found flaws in her. She could never kiss right. The relationship quickly deteriorated. For three weeks, it was only media hype that occurred between us. Not that it was all bad; it was just too much action and not enough interaction. Here is the time when knighted values became a code I lived by. But I could not just break it off. Existence became bittersweet. It was well within May when I was on the phone with Demarcus bragging about the dilemma I was in. unfortunately Monica was also on the line. Monica was uh, I’ll say furious. Mine was a loathsome path indeed. So officially it was over. Unofficially however, after the Pamela pursuits, I started receiving phone calls about what I should bring to her birthday party. It was determined that she should have an underline under her name. Afterwards, we tried on several occasions to reboot a relationship, but it wasn’t meant to be. She disclosed that I was loved but she could not love me. I’d betrayed her one time to many. Still Monica Jordan ranks in the top 20 of all heart holders. The lesson learned from her was never toy with a heart that’s true.

This is the "attractive" test. Reply to the person that post this with your answers. Re-Post this blank and see who will fill this out for you. You may be surprised to see some of the answers. BE HONEST!!! Do i look like a good kisser? [] yes [] no Would you kiss me? [] yes [] no Am I? [] beautiful! [] sexy azz hell [] fine [] pretty [] cute [] iight [] ugly! I look like.. [] a player [] slut [] whore [] hubby/wifey type [] one time thing [] next bf/gf If you saw me for the first time would you talk to me? [] Yes [] No Would you rather.. [] hook up with me [] cuddle with me [] have sex with me [] date me On a scale of 1-10 (10 being the highest), rate me.. [] 1 [] 2 [] 3 [] 4 [] 5 [] 6 [] 7 [] 8 [] 9 [] 10 Are you going to repost this so i can answer for YOU? [] yes [] no what would you want me to be to you? [] friend [] fuck buddy [] girl friend/boy friend [] hubby [] friend w/ benifits

Early LoreTracey Lynn DunningtonThe Third Tracee encounter It had to be around the month of April,1992 after I celebrated the date of my birth. I was in my first apartment, having delusions of grandeur. My roommate Chris was lamenting about a girl seemingly lost to him, and we connected because I too had a girl lost to me… May had come, still no luck. I meet a few women though. A different Tracey had become a cancer to me. A green-eyed woman had me where she wanted me, almost. This had become depressing. So, in efforts to belay this fate, I began to go to a new church with the ham Orlando. He began to weave an intricate tale about a certain household in Hephzibah, where sometimes the amorous natures of three girls often got the best of them. This had to be stopped! I thought that this might buy the time I needed to get over the first fake Tracee encounter. Orlando revealed that two of the women were taken; I was to go entertain the third. Phone calls were made. I talked to a voice that sounded mischievous, so I became like-wise, a few stray remarks were taken lightly. I really didn’t have any idea about what was to happen. But what did happen was almost ruined by Orlando. Let me explain, we rode over to their house, it’s late mind you, so he and his date begins to argue. Seems as though more guys were at the house, but that’s another story altogether. The young lady I was talking to however, was indeed interested; but (I can’t prove that she was single!) she was busy playing referee for the feuding couple. Nevertheless, I sat on the couch discouraged. Then around ten minutes later, I found myself on the long trek back home, whole trip to see her wasted, but I did leave my number with her… I was disturbed that Orlando wasted a perfectly good evening. The girl wasn’t even in the ballpark of acceptable. She had an amorous nature, still I called that night. We toyed with the idea of sating our carnic passions (No, we talked about cheesecake.). Anyhow, I was curious about the reasons why this one had such a history of amorous acts (Okay, I was starved for affection, sue me!). So I invited her over for a sleepover, or was it the other way around… Anyhoo, Chris ordered pizza and we were quickly prepared to party. Surprising enough, her mother dropped her off. This was odd because she told her mother that she was going over some girl’s house. The atmosphere was strained until Tracey grew weary of watching TV and suggested we shake our tucas. Oh, by the way Tracey had brought along kid sister and her cousin to entertain Chris. So a few moments all hearts were light. Then we grew weary as the night grew young. It was Chris who suggested we watch TV again, but with a new twist: Porno Flicks! Chris had ulterior motives; I on the other hand was innocent until proven guilty. Needless to say, it wasn’t long before media hype transpired. I was very masterful I must say. So much that in fact, kid sister kept interrupting to see what was causing such commotion. Chris? Oh, he was highly upset. Seems as though, with two young ladies to choose from, it was hard for him to choose which one he wanted to get with. So he tried getting with both, at the same time. This is a no-no. He spent the night on the couch. Life for approximately three weeks was good. Monica was phoning in, vying for time, but she possessed no wherewithal to sway the headstrong pursuit of happiness. After the three weeks however, I drifted into oblivion. I was out of contact with her, and this meant out of a relationship to her. Unfounded reports flooded my limited horizons. Truthfully, my heart never left her. Sure there was static in the air, but it is expected with spring fervor in the air. It would take three more months to find her again. I learned that all what was said was true. I renewed a vow to love eternally whilst she snuck away to the mall with another guy (perhaps Baby-daddy?). Now crushed and dejected, Christmas that year was marred with the death of a romance. After the fact, she made a visit down to my second apartment; we used to meet each other at the teen club. She wound up being ranked as #3 on the most loved charts. Oh, we almost got back together in Nov. 1995, but I was merely under the influence of that weird month… At first, I was searching for that Beasely woman within her, but love became real and I believe it wasn’t for me. That last time we were together we discussed finality to the relationship, but I was whisked away by the charitable. So who knows, mayhaps she could’ve been… the message she taught was the way of the teenager. She may, if not corrupted by today’s society, become a true lover. Fin

Let's Be Friends: The Male Kiss of Death I don't know when this started exactly. but i do know that particular phrase always means "sorry charlie, you dont cut it." Lord I wish you guys had Charlie Singleton's Cd "Man on a Mission". But the words are as Follows: She said Sorry Charlie, every night i pace the floor. Love is through, but life goes on without you, I dont wanna see you anymore.... She said Sorry Charlie, Im sure you've had dear Johns before, yes its true, so Close the door behind you, I guess i just dont love you anymore... how close is that to what really happens? (when a movie is made of my life, this song is definately gonna be in the sound track) can you see how the woman has been deliberating for a while about this decision. "every night i pace the floor" suggests she has been in this state for a while. Suddenly she comes to a conclusion, I dont wanna see you any more. No chance of reconciliation. Life is sure to go on without you. I promise if this was told to you a tear would form in your eye. Aw, dont be a baby about this, im sure you've had this done before. as a matter of fact, shut the door on your way out. It it is reason enough to become a loather. No she didnt love me, not before, not now, not anymore. Is it right for the guy to be upset after all this happens to him? Why even bother? well other people state that it's better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all. But i say love is valueless if only one of you is experiencing it. and that brings me back to the topic, lets be friends. Why? Can i love a friend? by definition only lovers love. So when she tells me she wants to be friends does this mean we cannot love each other? If not, how many friends do you love? Oh, wait, you dont love your friends like that, but when youve been lovers, can you be friends afterwards? At one time He was ideal, now he's idle. I think these things you go through when lovers become friends, because after your love ends, no one tells you what you become then. Stranger than fiction? Or better still what if its not in the cards. Whoa! we have to consult the Tarot? GO FISH! seriously, no one knows what the future holds. Why suggest that a deck of cards knows all that would happen to any couple at any given time at any given place. The guy leaves thinking he needs to carry around rabbits feet thinking that would change his luck, when in actuality she just didnt want to try to continue this relationship. Ladies be honest, being friends with us is as valueless as wet foodstamp. When will you call us and swap lasangna recipies? thats what you do with your friends. It will alieviate alot of the angst after the breakup. thinking lets be friends is a form of letting him down easy isnt what you call kosher. Id rather hear the truth, I guess i just dont love you anymore. Thank you very much, now i can see if someone will love me like i want them to. I remember a piece of one of my more angrier earlier poems.. uh,.it goes like this.. So the story to me is nothing new, I'll bet youve found another guy thats appealing to you whom ever he is, he is not me. So why buy a love when you can get it for free. You cant explain it, i cant ignore it. We fought the last round and my love was forfeit. Now come again, no thats ok, keep stepping. Another will come your way and you'll learn your lesson. I guess you're supposed to be some kind of Love Mack You gets all and dont give none back, well i refuse to be herded like sheep. And a tear'll fall out your eye when you call her a creep.

Saga of the Web-mantic III A Confessions Supplement Re: Tainted Lover In the midst of a relatively quiet Summer-Madness, I find reason to pick up a pen and weave the tale of a wayward soul a man who struggles against his own inner demons, for the sake of the better good. I ask you reader, what is one man’s struggle in a world that lacks compassion. I’ll tell you, futile. Still, I travel on in search of that perfect romance. So far this search has yielded nothing. So, I swear my path was cursed by Eve. Mayhaps she has a personal vendetta against me. I stand ready for her. I was knighted just for this cause. Eve seems to be compassion’s greatest enemy. Ngozi Adanna? Lost among these pages. I tell you its grim out and about in this fray we call dating. A weekend excursion back home had me sorting emotion about Nikki Lake. I came to the knowledge that this could not ever happen; due to etiquette (Nikki and Charity were friends,). Mrs. Right is probably my friend. Remember Keisha J.? (Late summer, early fall issue of 1995) you do? Well, she’s trying to seduce an ever so crafty knight. This cannot be. Wasn’t she classified as unworthy of my affections? Subjecting her to the maw would only destroy her delicate psyche. I must say I am much too noble to play with children. On the Netscape, I haven’t been on! But at my last note, I could swear Cheatleta was lost among these Toombs. I don’t chat with her much. Sincerity has no merit in that TV screen. Love runs as abundant as ever online, but in real life, this emotion is as elusive as happiness. Still, (and yet even,) online still serves as my romantic shot. With the euphoria it produces, I can very easily become addicted, as you have seen in the spring. So these two weeks of respite will probably help me deal with the one called Sinderlla (Stephanie). Still a bit morbid from Negotiations with Ngozi, I could easily get caught up once more in a faux relationship. And this cannot be good. At the jobsite: There are a few notables, its just shameful that the dating game has corrupted so. This foreign land promotes underhanded techniques as a reputable dating medium. We have the lovers that are disguised as friends; sworn enemies that are apparently the most passionate lovers. Blast this crass age! All the cutie pies are among the promiscuous. I can almost swear that there are at least three young ladies that like me, this is speculation though (and perhaps a bit of ego involved,). Besides, I’m holding myself in reserve for that major romance that’ll probably happen in the fall. My thoughts remain dark after I was loved by someone that was off the market. Bad thing is that I could’ve returned the favor, with no questions asked (and you said there were no dark desires!). Anyhow, this could’ve come at a better time. A care-less saying has put me on someone’s kiss list. Pshaw! More undue attention. Forest City will never produce (naturally) the lover I seek. Incidentally, I’ve discovered I am what you would call a troubadour. Destined to long for some forbidden love or in my case, an unattainable passion. Also I’m still cast within the guise of the crusading knight, seeking the favor of the noble’s wife. So this is why I feel so removed from today’s society. These coveted knightly values were issued nearly 2000 years ago. Now this is exciting in itself. The Scarlet Order has always been shrouded in mystery. One should always rejoice when knowledge has revealed itself to you. Ancient energies surge through archaic pathways. Still with this knowledge, I am still without my queen. There can’t be anything worse than this. Unfounded rumors about Jenny come in. why do I entertain these people?! Seems as though, Jenny seems to have a (alleged,) dark history. I’m concerned that her beau may hold this against her. Oooh! This has become interesting! Let’s see. 08/08/99 Tsk, tsk, would there be one among the cyber-romantics? I found out Friday that Sinderlla is fishing. I had taken the bait. Now I jump off the line. It is so unfortunate that these potential mates are being corrupted by the web. It is terrible I can’t stop this unyielding search for my mate. I can’t stop using the web, for it broadens my search. I’ll say it like I’ve said before; Mrs. Right is beyond the sea watching for me. Destiney (is she still around?) 03 still suggests that it is I that her heart beats for. Can this be or rather she is the most honorable among those thieves. Wistful thinking has it that she is able to feel me like I feel her (or felt?) through that accursed TV screen. Isn’t that just sick? The plot thickens. Ok, I want to include Jenny here, but there is no real reason to do so. Mayhaps it is the dark desires of an arcane ledger? Nah! She is pretty much taken off the market, but begrudgingly so. I’ll keep you posted. 08/11/99 still in knightly doldrums and this respite is golden. I now have time to hone skills and refine my art. I feel like those pre-Tracee years. Ah! I suppose I was happier then. You know, the 90’s have been filled with angst and heartache. This date finds me seeking the solace of the kindred soul once more. 09/07/99 Lets say for reasons unbeknownst to me, I am moved by special cosmic forces. I ask, why did I miss Anissa Sunday? And yet again, why neglects to answer the question. Perhaps the cosmic forces knew that I would shy away, curse myself and romance or, perchance, I am not ready to deal with her just yet, too many outside influences. Yesterday, I caught up with Destiney03 and Sinderlla (Mwa ha ha!). Nothing’s changed. Cheatleta still calls me #1 although I know better than this. And she discloses how much I am missed among the various nicks that are called the net. But for some reasons beyond her control, she had to leave. I think some guy was coming over. And just before this happens, Sinderlla comes on passing out various goodies, until she sees my nick in the room. I deftly went into whisper mode. She wondered where I had been. I began to weave the tale of a busy individual. Then she asked why I didn’t call. I gave a toothy grin because I felt it was time to end this effrontery. I quickly accosted her, citing she was a wanted woman. I was referring to the night I came on and everyone wanted Sin. Then, I berated her by telling her I feel unimportant, and unneeded. She quickly responded by saying, “Hogwash!” Then she performed skillful maneuvers that had me on the defensive, but I wasn’t to be on the defensive, not today! The highlight of the evening was her sending me a long overdue picture of her. I was stunned. Stephanie was decent enough to inquire about. As I returned to the room, I was flooded with emotion unchecked from this 20 something woman. It was long enough to contemplate romance (?) but then, sobering thoughts like, this is the web, Duh! It makes you well aware of all the sex and lies that transpire so carelessly. But should I call and become lost, may God help me! -> Its still “Just to see her,” for me. I’ll guarantee that once I set eyes upon her, all animosities would be denied, and life would become livable once again. But alas, it is not, and so, I suffer. And speaking of suffering, I see Ngozi, and she wonders how I do. I do very well without her, thank you. She has been deemed unworthy of my love so… Anyhow, I figure to be entitled to a spot of happiness. Anissa still represents that aspect of romance unattainable to me. So yes, I still have a need for her. But the question is could I want her? Many people would buckle down under these sordid conditions, but I relish the fact that Knighted strength hasn’t failed even though my heart seems comatose. This thing with Sin has thrown me for a loop. I hadn’t called yet, and its two days later. I want to, but then again, I could be that sucker again. I already feel like I’ve been had for wanting to call Stephanie. As I remember our conversation, she was cool, even amid someone else trying to get with her. This was the reason I didn’t want to get involved in the first place. Now here I am contemplating a bad move. Alright, who’s cursed romance? And speaking of cursed romances, did you not know that during High School, it is ok to trample a heart or two? According to a girl, (ah to live and die in Forest City, tsk,) this is natural. All because romance as we know it wasn’t taken seriously. I suppose no one believed in the Mr. Right of yore. This explains a lot of the shady misgivings within the lives of the women of Forest City. As we all know, I took romance extremely seriously, for my heart was precious. I sought to give it to one who’d treasure it as much as I, if not better. Perhaps, this was my problem, if I had adopted this bit of information, maybe I’d posses a still-born vengeance-seeker and love would be a touch away, but that is wistful thinking. I can’t condone folks destroying hearts for nonchalant ness. This is why folks have extra-curricular affairs, it brings back their youth! I was taught that a special girl would come along within those wonder years and you’d be married and live happily ever after. I guess that shows how naïve I was. It’s amazing; my rule number one has a special meaning all its own. Always assume she doesn’t love you. It’s true! She didn’t love, she liked. Whereas he was debating futures, she was contemplating who was cuter. Here I am, almost 15 years from my first girlfriend, emotionally torn, and unable to love effectively because of High School romances. And this is natural (?) and can’t be taken seriously. So, what am I saying? Hearts can be broken at any age, but the period between 14 and 18 are the most impressionable when it comes to affairs of the heart. So have compassion, otherwise the next heart you might break may be your own. 09/13/99 Curse me for being such a coward. Or here comes heartbreak #3. Word has it among a couple of friends that a certain gorgeous, intelligent (be still my beating heart) lady has designs on me. Well turns out that, I have designs on her. Only problem is that the girl is gorgeous. She brings out all my well-hidden anxieties and fears. She, on the other hand, figures me to be high-strung because I hadn’t made an approach. This will change shortly, for I require a listening ear also. I’m still a bit timid because of my destiny; I figure why not die within the arms of one who desires me the most. Unfounded reports of who has their eyes on me flood in. Sub-consciously I dodge all such attention, waiting on that major storm to make land fall. Lesser squalls like Lavella (who tried to flirt with me again..) gets blown away. Back to the pretty lady, this is a preamble, if and when we (the horrifying thought is that we may never become more than friends, curse this Forest City!) get together, even more guarded questions would come about. Still a bit ambient for here it is two days later and all that was said was “hello.” I almost lost my temper. Thoughts like, “who is she compared to the legacy of the Knight? And how did I reply? “Hey!!....” I aught to be shot. I’m still disturbed because here are folks wanting to be my friend. I don’t want to be anyone’s friend. I seek lovers, I seek a mate. You can’t find either of those definitions within the word “friend”. To me, a friend is confusing to the one trying to be your lover. Interference is something you don’t want to have in a budding relationship. So what is it with this friendship anyways? The Oft Untold Plight Of the “nice guy” He is never #1 in her eyes, but she is the apple of his eyes and the peach of his cheek. She is perfect in every way in his mind’s sight, whereas he is perfect for meaningless conversations about nothing at all. To him, this is the prelude to the greatest love affair he almost has. But to her, this is the perfect love affair that she’ll never have. She desperately wants a lover in all aspects, but all she finds are crooks. He is that perfect lover she is wanting, but she never looks. This could go on for hours, but I choose to stop and ask why such is true. Well its simple, bad boys hog the limelight. Our generation is geared into thinking that all attention-grabbers are some type of hero. Or, they are worthy of all affection generated by what they have done. Usually, the one gaining the spotlight is a notorious fiend. Just think, who gets referred to the most, the out-house builder, or the demolition man. The out-house builder has only one special talent and he serves that need. You don’t talk about him. You call him only when you need him. The demo man? Well heck, he has a movie about himself, he’s slapped Shauna, or, my God, he’s killed Kenny! All these are fuel for topics of debate, and before long, he is all you think about. This is the reason “Nice Guys” have a short life expectancy. Because after the aforementioned treatment she administers, he just might turn rogue, no longer maintaining the status of “nice”. It is only then when the girl he sought after finds him cute! I am a hapless fool. 09/17/99 I found myself forsaking all others for that most wonderful woman. My only wish is to show her that I can do something no one else could; love effectively. Bah! Curse me for being such a romantic. I am still in doldrums, meaning no one can claim me for theirs. This is terrible. To update everyone, I did get a chance to approach C.C. and the result was a smile and nothing more. Here it is the 27th and I am pondering what am I waiting for. (Hostility levels creeping skyward,..) I understand there are loose ends to tie up, but the worst thing you can do is put me on a delayed waiting schedule. I am only for a season, passing very quickly. Hold the phone! An unfounded rumor has it that Jeraldine NMI’s younger son could be mine! Ah, rumored happiness, wait, reality rolls in on a cold front. She has someone else in her life, wait he’s supposed to be gone! Could the monster of these annals be mine after all this time? Meantime, I received a hug from Jenny and it left me with a curious passion. Is it odd? No, just the arcane desires of an unsung knight. I still feel the hurricane-induced effects. I’m getting too much attention. Now let me see, we’ve covered C.C. Next is Barbara. This is a job romance, sorta. It’s confusing really (such is the plight of the Scarlet Knight). She’s within her late 30’s. Mocha skinned around 165 lbs, bright eyed beauty. Well about two weeks ago, I was flirting half-heartedly and she responded (much to my dismay)! The only bad thing about this is, I’m still ga-ga over C.C. This holds no bearing on the night-quarter (date) scheduled this weekend. It’s more than likely that we should remain friendly. I’ve ascertained that we stand on different grounds (plus I’m still ga-ga over C.C.). I hate that, but that’s life within these tainted eyes. Alas, hurricane season leaves broken lives in its wake. So we are left with one, this ‘Tina’. I don’t know if I can get “I like you Mike,” out of “Go with me to Maryland with me this Thanksgiving.” But, I did. She’s in her late 20’s, two kids, about 5’9” but still cute as a button. This is about all the present information I have on her. I have one question, since when did I become the object of desire? I declare the summer was mad, but this Hurricane season is confounding! A few under-agents (teenagers) are even testing my mettle. But alas, there are even less worthy folk than ever. The one I’m looking for comes with this smile and kiss. But then again, with the bleak outlook for the new millennia, you can find it hard pressed to discover a reason to date. But I will, although I am somewhat less than what I was, my resolve is strong and none shall thwart it! Who else knows of my plight? No one. See, lack of compassion prevents others from getting involved. This is why you can’t find lovers that are true out here. They have no compassion. As compassion’s champion, this confounds me so. I have no missions to complete, no honors to defend, and dragons run rampant over this forsaken land. Ladies and gentlemen, (sort that out amongst yourselves) I have C.C.’s rich and prolific history at my disposal. Her’s is a path most unsuitable for print. Oh yeah, first I gotta sing, ‘carnival time is here, magical time of year, and as that time draws near, Dreams lift my heart!’ And now, the date! Night quarter 10/29/99 was perhaps the most entertaining date to date. I enjoyed every moment, for a while. At first, I was timid. She broke the ice with conversation. I became the Knight once more, and became inquisitive. So now, halfway to the restaurant, we are digging into each other’s history. The first thing I discover is that we would never become more than friends, because she is still married! How is one expected to endure? Compassion’s champion wooing an already spoken for woman. The life of a troubadour is for me. Now I’m discouraged beyond belief, my mind saw the future of a love affair with her, I’m wishing she’d get a divorce and she’s not moving fast enough for my tastes. This could be a topic on Jerry Springer, Married folk who want other folks. There is nothing in the world more nerve wrecking, than when your girl is playing you and you are unsuspecting. These are none truer words reader. It used to be that you look beyond faults and seek all that I require. I was selfish then. I recognize my shortcomings for being a little selfish; it’s a throwback from being an emotional entity. I have no choice but to travel on further. Who knows, I may find what I’m looking for, but I remain doubtful. Once we make it to the restaurant, I am trying to make the most of it. Heck, I’m paying; I may as well enjoy my date. I begin to pour on the charm, becoming that debonair guy that I am (smile). And out of the clear blue, she asks me about some girl that likes me that I don’t have any involvement with. My jaw drops, because I learn that she is telling everyone I know that we are dating, and this was far from the truth. Needless to say, I lost my appetite. I was ready to go. The rest of the date was eventless; I turned off the charm spigot, and watched the movie. Barbara, sadly enough, I still see that sparkle in her eyes every time she looks at me. I don’t foresee any intensification in this area. My story is still a destiny unfulfilled. Hopefully, if I maintain my distance, she’ll lose interest and go away quietly. There are too many careless suggestions and broken hearts at my job site. It is proving to be a wondrous bed of varied personas but the noblest of these happens to be an old woman. She seeks happiness in solitude. I happen to know you can not find Happiness there. Happiness is elusive and a recluse. But she is harbored within the arms of the one promised to me. Charity Renee, wait, ya’ll didn’t see that. Where did she come from? And why is she bothering me? Others swear I’ve suffered enough from her hands. Evidently, she doesn’t think so. She won’t be able to wrestle a mote of passion from me. I really don’t like what she did to me. No! She won’t be the anomaly to destroy a knight’s incarnation and then destroy another. Plus, I find it enjoyable to leave her out of my life totally. There are still no forbearers, but I remember a passage written by Anissa a year ago asking me if this was a game. And even today, I’m forced to consider if these varied personas I exude find pleasure from the premise of romance. 10/09/99 A Night-Quarter to find the one they call Destiney03. It was doomed from the start. All that was accomplished was a 10 minute phone conversation that yielded yet another empty promise. Still undaunted, I know she is no longer in the race to become heartbreak number three. Heck, she couldn’t be number two and three anyways. C.C.? Honestly, I really don’t think there is too much to go on about. She is coming in on this Christian angle. I just want to pilfer what’s in her mind. Barbara? I think she has a lot of history, but I can’t click with her. This next major romance should be both beautiful and yet, deadly. These women don’t possess enough oomph to make me conform to their causes. Ten years ago, I swore there was none worthy. So I find myself cross because I could care less for these peons I see everyday. I mean, how could they compare to the virtual goddesses like Tracey Dunnington, Diana Benjamin (God rest her soul,) or Tracee Beasely? No contest, I say. Forest City has found its niche in promiscuity untrue. I search for a true blue lover. To heck with friends. C.C. called me a friend. Now, she will realize what this means to me. Paradise lost ring a bell? Ah, but it will soon enough! à I almost hate friends worse than being called “too nice”. ß Barbara called me friend. Their battle-cry is friends before lovers. My motto is friends don’t sound like lovers. I’ve said, the ideal lover becomes idle when you become friends, so when your love ends, what do you become then? 10/16/99 Well now, surely C.C. has shown me what a friend is. She was spotted at a local football game with someone other than herself. Quickly now, is there any reason to pursuit in this direction? My embittered countenance will forever tell the tale of the misfit. But then again, did I really want to be with her? Probably not. All this angst was for what; to be her friend? How disgusting! I think I said it best when I disclosed that the knight is too passionate to be anyone’s friend. I remain at that level even long after the romance is long dead. But such is the plight of the Scarlet Knight. Oh, how I wish I was slow to love and quick to loathe! Hey, but did you notice that the morning was extremely bright? I have no choice but to find joy within it. Besides, hurricanes only last for a season. I suppose I can name some of the hurricanes that were spawned within this 10th month, among these cool months, Tabitha Ezzy made landfall 11 years ago as did Deetra Willis. Andrea almost became a major hurricane, but lacked wherewithal. Her friend Carlotta was the one remembered for 1990. It was also this time when Diana Benjamin ravaged the coasts. 10 years ago, I was celebrating Lena missing the shoreline, and then hurricane Emmie surprised everyone. But she didn’t do nearly as much damage as Hurricane Tracee. And speaking of hurricane Tracee, here it is 10/21/99 and I speak with the infamous Tracee Marvel, and I’ll swear I’ll be forever enthralled with this siren. And before I go on a bit further, it is still too early to become bitter, although it does help. Anyhow, I decide to phone to see what the ever-so-friendly Queen of my heart is doing, come to find out that, she’s single too! Is it too early for Christmas? She hinted that I could very well behold her as mine after 10 years of waiting. I will express doubt here. I’ve heard this before, if she is my destiny, I would have to relocate to Atlanta. I don’t know, but I just may seek Chealeta, a very bad move. Then again, the hope against hope suggests that she may actually be mine own for the taking, but will I be available for her? You realize that C.C. is not totally out of my system. I found this out 10/24/99 when I saw her (the rampant rumor was she was there just to see me, but uh…) and I was filled with both love and hate. My first thought was to remain vigilant and not say anything, but that would be too easy. So I sauntered up and said hello, and what did I receive; A sort of disinterested hi. Hmpf! Still undaunted, a quick smile flashed and so my job was complete. I tried and nothing more was said. What more could I do? Go out on a limb and ask just what is her malfunction (making matters worse); disclose some truly heartfelt emotions (to disinterested ears)? No, no, no we are only friends for crying out loud. How can I truly have heartfelt emotions about somebody who (I’m thinking) could care less? 110299 Again the rumor was she was there to see me (mayhaps, it was to see me gravel in her presence, grumble; mutter) all I can say is that I loved her again. I just hate my situation. -> Tracee Marvel has me quivering with unnamed passions (again!). a few days ago, I endeavored an e-mail explaining heartfelt emotion and reasons why. She can never understand her art, of what she truly done. But all I asked was permission to be her friend. all I require is affection from the one who knows me the best. What I received was an e-mail explaining that all I am is just an acquaintance, no more than the sum of the on average two phone calls a year. I remember when romance used to be when someone thought of you enough to bridge the gap years down the road. But I suppose times have changed for the worse. She summed it all up with rules of being her friend which sounded like change Mikesommore. I think this is crazy and underhanded. 110399 Ahhh! Ack!!! Tracee needed me! I now find it very difficult to think clearly. Her exact statement was I was the type of guy she required when she was in college. My thoughts were “ ..and, I wasn’t yours?” I have to ensure she doesn’t destroy me again because it is, well, November. Tsk, and on the lighter side… In cyber land, Sinderlla was kicked to the curb for sheer femalizm (what?! You didn’t know?). What can one do? If anyone ever wanted me, they need to show their claims, for I’m just about ready to swear off all forbearers. Omigosh, smitten with the thought ‘reunited with Tracee,’ has me thinking crazy thoughts. Anyhow, back to cyberspace, another nick has taken a shining to the Hymnal. I’m remaining despondent (heck, no one is getting a fair chance with the Beasely woman around) I mean, who needs another cyber-romantic in Atlanta? Cheatleta seldom sends me anything any longer. Who cares? Tracee’s pending. Ce Ce’s wondering what has happened to us. Well, Tracee’s friendly. This is a bad month for me to be acting this way. The three terrors are not to be forgotten. Here it is two days before the anniversary, the tenth anniversary of our dating and if asked, I’ll swear I’m in love with her again. Never mind if all this is a clever ruse designed to slay me. Who cares if has another in Decatur. I’m too far into this to turn back now. After all these years of loving and hating her, I suppose I can now love her like she designed me to. And again I turn to the heavens and discover that no matter how grand I feel, I am but no one in the eyes of my beholder. Jeraldine makes herself visible within my universe. She now works at the jobsite. Ok, the master and the upstart meet, destroying the tapestry that created affection for them anyhow. The question is, would she be able to displace the promising Tracee Marvel? Probably not. Tracee’s talking to me. The NMI? Publically shunning, but visually stunning. Besides, she is not hers to give away. But this does not stop the nay-sayers from debating the topic. If I enter the debate, all solutions point towards a no win situation (although this month is very weird and anything can happen). If I had a choice I’d choose the one known only as the Beasely woman. I think this is all a sinister plot against my heart. I still found affection squaring itself for the Beasely woman. She can’t want me truly, so she has to have something to gain from the friendly Michael. Although she must realize that Mike: the lover has everything for her. Don’t you just hate this month? And as the year, century grows weary, knight what is it that you desire? Still i want nothing more than a lover in all its aspects. I question why because that is so hard to discover. I still search for Tracee’s smile, Robynetta’s kiss and Rosalyn’s technique in every girl. Many disclose that beggars shouldn’t be choosy, but shouldn’t you want the best for yourself? Cyberland. Destiney03 asks can she be my #1. Whew, you ask a lot. I doubt if I’d ever relinquish #1 for anyone whose name doesn’t sound like Tracee. The real question is could she get a fair chance amid the euphoria/purgatory that is November? Here I am again acting if I am nothing more than the sum of the words uttered towards me. The Scarlet fraction increased itself on the promise of happiness at Tracee’s hands. But isn’t she my sworn enemy? This is the bittersweet emotional battle that I have been going for ten years. Every time I say ten years some part of me expresses surprise. I never expected to love anyone this long. My suggestions to the net-mantic called Destiney03? I advised Chealeta to not place her affection within a tattered soul such as mine. Without Tracee, I would not be able to love her effectively. No one I know wishes this for themselves. 112299 ! Ahhhhh the cycle continues… I talked with Tracee and she showed how deftly she can manipulate my various personas. Why wouldn’t she know how to push my buttons? Any how, she began saiting the knighted 2/3rds of me, then she engaged in an intimate battle with my darker side. I don’t know too many people who can survive DF, she wouldn’t be one of them. She would leave me me pondering if I should feed her to the maw. Now if this would happen, I just may lose all respect for her. This wont be good, but who wouldn’t want to love her physically as well as mentally? Only problem is my title. I am still her friend; a fond cohort. My thoughts darken… Stephanie calls also this evening. The girl is still with home dude. What could she want with me? You can’t have cake and ice cream too. 03 swears (aren’t y’all tired of her?) I am the one her heart beats for. Likey story. All of a sudden, I become available on the must attain lists of the net girls. Ce Ce Lord! I don’t know if it’s safe to assume if she likes me or not. I guess I should call and find out. Again it’s the anniversary of the end. Usually it’s foretold by dark clouds on the horizon. But today, it’s a bright sunny day. See what happens when Tracee gets put in the mix, every thing gets thrown in chaos.

Early Lore Pamela Emmie-Maria VanEisjden It was spring, wonderful spring. How else a story of deception would bring about a smile to my face and joy to my heart. It was a good year that year. You can’t tell this story without telling the tale of two other women that were indirectly involved at the time. Monica Jordan and Kamika last name unknown, so this will be hard indeed. But I will do my best to recreate the times and events that compose this relationship. Lord that guy on Oprah makes it hard for us folks who tells the story the way it went… but here it goes… It was late April, 1991. The squire to the order was busy with a certain Monica Jordan. Life was pretty much mundane. I was seeing the world through the eyes of a USMCR pfc, so I was pretty disenchanted with everything that was going on around me. It just so happens that our band Kaytreo was doing a talent show. We would provide the music for various singers in the CSRA, all for a nominal fee. The first rehearsal is where I would first notice this trio of ladies who was to lip-sync to “Sex U up” by them colored bad kids. They were, as Simon would say, “A bad karaoke act.” They wanted to know what they needed to make their act better. And perchance it was I they would ask. This may have been their plan all along, but that is just ego and speculation. I suggested that they actually sing. That was thrown out after a few bars, but still undaunted they worked on their choreography. We went on to the next group. But I kept noticing Kamika checking me out during the rehearsals. I was kinda honored and all, but after all, I was involved at the time, so it was hard to notice that Kamika was 5”4’ around 125lbs, pecan tanned with hazel eyes. I can’t remember that other chicks name that was in the group but she went unnoticed too (meaning she looked good too! I saw her in a bathing suit, drool…). Pam was the only white girl of the group. Oh, excuse me, other than black. She was of Germanic decent. She was the quiet one. Blonde tresses to her shoulders, eyes blue as the sky, hips as round as… wait, this book is still G rated. Anyways, she was attractive. But unattainable because according to etiquette, you are not supposed to inquire about people’s friends when courting. So was I flirting? Of course I was. Monica was not satisfying the Knighted two thirds of my persona. So why did I continue with the relationship? Off hand I would say uh, Wait that’s another story. Two weeks later, the night of the talent show. The show went off without a hitch. Every one was festive (it is this night I think about when I listen to one of our early songs called “ah Kaytreo”) even though the girls lost, Kamika approached me backstage telling me of the after-party at the local teen club. The girl was coming on to me, but yet the guys in the band had other plans. So instead of hanging with the group, I head off to the teen club, only to be stood up. After an hour of hanging out with the Deejay, I decide to break camp, only to see them in the parking lot. They called me over, and told me they couldn’t stay, which was cool. I wasn’t planning on staying either. Kamika wanted my number so we could keep in touch, but she had no pockets and didn’t have her purse. So she has Pam, the ever ready, to hang on to my number until they get home. So they left, and I walked home that night high on the promise of what was on the horizon for me. Little did I know fate had made other plans. Etiquette rules states that once you get a phone number, you wait until the next weekend before you call. The very next day, I receive a phone call from a Pamela E.M. VanEisjden. I didn’t ask why, it didn’t bother me that she called. I enjoyed the conversation! I believe that is the key to my heart. A good conversation and a firm gams. =) Anyways, we talked everyday up until Friday. Friday is when Kamika calls. I proceed to berate Kim (Kamika liked to be called Kim) about her not calling me. And I told her about Pam calling me. She was like, what?! She eventually wrote it off and invited me down to the DYA party on post that next night. Saturday evening, I get a ride up to the party and guess who was waiting for me at the front entrance. Pam. I spoke and asked where Kamika was. She said she wasn’t there and didn’t know if she was coming or not. Stood up again, but at least this time I was with somebody. She decided that we shouldn’t stay, but to instead go to the teen club. I was cool with it, at least down there, I knew everybody. So off we went. The club was packed. And I walked in with the most beautiful girl there. My best friend Chris was like, Yo! Mike is she with you? So you know I was on top of the world. Bad thing is that I was b.r.o.k. I didn’t have enough money for the “e”. I had enough money to buy her a soda. But that wasn’t the point that night. She was just happy to be there with me. I was happy to be there with her. We danced. And since I’m such a marvelous dancer, I wore the dance floor out with her. I was the man until a slow song came on. And I immediately headed off the dance floor. She was having no parts of that. She snatched me up and just like that the whole world fell away. I became lost in her eyes. To this day I cannot remember the name of the song that played, or how many dances we danced. All I remember is that she kissed me. And I couldn’t move after that. Dragonfly reared his ugly head. Then she tried to leave me on the dance floor. You can’t leave a man in a predicament like that. So she had to walk in front of me to our seats. We began a conversation that started with; did I do that to you? But it ended with us calling ourselves a couple. Kamika called the very next day asking why I never showed at the DYA party. I asked where was she, because I was there, and that Pam said that you wasn’t there and wasn’t gonna be there! She said, Pam said what? And I began to explain that we went to the teen club and we were now a couple. Now to Kamika, Pam became all types of B’s and holes. And told me I was stupid because I chose to be with her. All I said was that Pam called me. She was livid. Monday afternoon I was treated to stories of Kamika and Pam getting into a fight at school and you know what that does to a guy’s popularity. (And ego!) Even now I was still involved with Monica J. I was needed to do something about this. One was pleasing the carnal side of me and the other was satisfying my mind. I needed one girl to do this. Then I had help from my cousin, now minus one Monica I began my campaign to seduce ole blue eyes. Every weekend I was out to her house, pushing the envelope. With school out, it was almost a daily thing. Then I find out they are going out of town for a week. I would be without her for a whole week?! You know what absences do to hearts! Terror destruction and mutilation! Anyways once she got back, she had to contend with the omni-powered Dragonfly. Bad thing is that she had only one partner before me, and I am not the type of guy that you would want to have as #2. But a plan was enacted for me to stay the night. (Caution: Evil nefarious plans about to be discussed, watch your children) I was to make like I was going home, but in actuality I was in the downstairs bathroom =). We make awkward love that night. I feel ashamed that I would destroy another heart like hers until the next morning after her dad leaves for work. While Pam is in the shower, I saw her diary on her nightstand. I took a gander at her latest entries, “I love mike, mike makes me feel…..today I met Rico… I miss mike,.. Rico kissed me today… I was like Who is Rico?! I get dressed head downstairs and out the door. I get home and mom tells me some white chick has been calling me all day. I call Pam and ask her who Rico is. She begins crying and saying that she met him on her trip and that nothing happened. I was like whatever. If that was nothing I wonder what was something. Meantime, Pam’s mom and dad were going through a divorce. Her mom’s was going to move back to Washington State. And Pam was to go with her. You should’ve seen the cold looks I was giving her. My mind was going, oh, you wanna get back to ole Rico huh? But instead I said, look I don’t do long distance relationships. We should just break up now. That way you can get on with your life and not worry about what’s going on back here. Because lets face it, you’re never coming back to Augusta and I’m never flying out to Washington, let’s keep it real, break up now. After many tears she agreed and we were broken up, only for her not to go. She only moved to the next town. We continued to be friends, but we could not make that step back into lovers. I swear she could’ve been the one, but with all the deception going around could true love been the backbone of this spring love affair?