Jezzebelle's blog: "My Poems dealing with heartbreak"

Every new beginning,
comes from some beginnings end.

Every time you kill me,
I am born again.

Every time you close that door,
Another door is opened.

And every time you say goodbye,
a different word is spoken.

Every time you look at me
my back is facing you,

And every time you ask to see me
I'll have something else to do.

Every time I join your game,
You're not playing fair,

And every time I really love you,
I pretend that I don't care.

Wanting,
lusting,
to be held,
to be loved,
to feel warmth,
to feel your beating heart.
Wanting to be sheltered from the cold,
heartless winds.
Falling into invisible arms;
into an abyss of love.
Wishing,
hoping,
that my desires will be filled;
my desires of loving warmth.
Wanting to be held,
comforted,
loved.
Dreaming of passionate embraces,
of tender kisses,
loving words,
romantic nights.
Waiting for undying love.

why do you pretend like
I don't matter to you
when you're all that
matters to me?

You are like the diamond
You glimmer and glow
And shine so brightly
Some, like me, draw close
To feel your warmth, your heat
Only to find none

You are like the diamond
You are bright and strong
But you have no warmth, or love
It's a terrible game
To play with people's hearts
Like mine

You are like the diamond
You will last longer than most
But you will have no love
No warmth to back up that bright light
So what kind of life will it be?
Besides long?

Will you regret it someday?
Regret being so much like the diamond
Regret being so cold
And look for me
And find me gone?
Can I ever leave?

No, I can never leave you
I am drawn to this cold light
This false sense of warmth you give
I keep wishing and hoping
That someday, you will give warmth
But, this will never be

Diamonds last forever

You said the words I love you,
But it is obvious things have changed.
I said the words I love you,
And my feelings are still the same.
You said I'll love you forever,
But forever wasn't long enough.
I said I'll love you always,
And I'll mean it forever.
But I can not imply to you
What that means,
'Cause your version of Forever
Isn't what it seems,
And my version of Always
Seems like an unrealistic dream

Yesterday's goals, dim memories.
Dark saddened eyes, blurring with tears.
Painful scars borne; Love's history.
Futures crumble when doubt appears.

No brightly lit hope envisioned,
When following after harsh words.
Hurt soul splits in twain, partitioned.
Swooned by appeal - when numbness lured.

Apologies made, never bought.
Price paid turned out far too costly.
Though never known what would be wrought -
Must walk into the night softly.

One wish, only to be released.
Granted - now receive this token.
Words written in rhyme, love's deceased.
When promises made . . . were broken.

Thinking. Can't stop thinking.
Think of you. This. That. That Life. That day.
That dream was mine.
A utopian dream.

Your aura; struck me like lightning to a tree.
Pointy, like a star, you shone.
So bright, yet not shining as a star would,
But as apparent as white chalk on a blackboard.
You would not show off like a star.
Yet you did burn so hot, so fiercely, so explosively -
you were a star in my eyes.

But like all stars, you died.
That gas was gone.
No pull between us.
The atmosphere was dry
and I began to choke.
I was taken from my star - like a child being taken from its poor,
drunken mother - I did not know what was happening.
Dazed. Confused. Without true reality, I there sat.
Wondering.

The end of my world had only just begun, with yours beginning.

You came into my life
As quickly as you left.
You grabbed a cutting knife
And sliced right through my breast.

You didn't mean to hurt
But what did you expect?

My heart now cut in two
It feels beyond repair.
Injury done by you
God, life just isn't fair.

You didn't mean to hurt
But what did you expect?

So here we are, just friends,
But I long to be more.
Desire with no end
Throbbing from my core.

You didn't mean to hurt
But what did you expect?

It's becoming more evident
Much more obvious to me
I thought much more of you
Than you ever thought of me

Was this my biggest mistake
Letting myself think you cared
Was I just your marionette
With heartstrings open and bared

With me left here still thinking
What was false, what was true
So puzzling and so complex
I�m left to await another clue

On my heartstings you played
Each left with a loving memory
Yet I still have those questions
Do you ever think about me

I�m wondering why all the intrigue
Now why all of this mystery
Why am I left here hanging
Your the one that holds the key.

It's gone
What's gone? My mind?
Soul? No, I'm fine
Not really
Deep inside, something is missing
The love and tender kissing
She walked out herself
Now all I do is talk to myself
in the mirror, with my reflection
My heart is dead
Soon it will make a resurrection
Once the wounds heal
And I'm loved for real
A type of love I can feel
But nobody loves me
Nobody cares
Nobody loves me
That nobody is me
I can't love myself because no one does
I'm all alone and no longer what I once was
But the only thing that keeps me alive
Is knowing that the next day, it might all change
For the best
And that "nobody" becomes somebody