Elizabeth502's blog: "My Poetry"

Look at you You sad, pathetic creature You sit there and you beg You cry and hope to be pitied He left you and you can't accept that You won't accept that He loved you and left you But you just sit there Disbelieving, you piece of shit Sad, pathetic creature Get back on your feet Move on, alone if you have to You crawled and you begged You laid there on your knees Why did you ask him to take you back? You nearly kissed his feet in suplication As you implored him to try it again Sad, pathetic creature Look at what you've become You're a shell of the person you once were He changed you, left you empty inside And yet you can't live without him You worship the ground he steps on Because you can't be stong on your own He became your whole world And it was shattered when he walked out But be brave, sad, pathetic creature Everything will turn out oka

It's hard to admit to yourself That you've fallen out of love Because it was so special It was agony to lose it Physical pain to see it slip away Now only bittersweet memories All thats left, to my regret I wish I could change how I feel Because everything became confusing Everything's conflicted But how to turn back the clock? How to flip the pages back? And though I no longer have your arms around me I no longer have those chains tying me down And though I'm standing alone I'm standing ON my own Will you miss me when I'm gone? Will you even know that I've left? Will you realize that I won't be back? Because I've had it, I'm through Finish the chapter, close the book The end is here, time for a new beginning All alone, but on my own, free of you You can push me, but you can't control me I have only one regret and only one wish I miss the caring, the love we shared I wish I hadn't fallen out of love with you But what can I do? I can't turn around and start all over again I can't go back and do things differently Though I wish it wasn't so, I can't change it And though I wish differently, I don't want it to change And, for the first time in my life, I'm free Nothing's holding me back from being me Nothing's in the way of me living my life The way I want to live it, the way I want it to be I have no need to impress, no burdens of a loved one And though I sometimes yearn for companionship I know I can have someone to hold me when I want it But sometimes I feel empty inside, With no hope of being filled again I was once in love with you, but that love died I still love you, nothing is ever going to change that But being in love with you, I'll never have that again

I struggle through this life Each day, a hard-won battle Trying to overcome the best I can Can I lock this pain away? I can't go forward, can't go back I'm stuck with unforgotten memories I can't feel at peace, can't break free Did I lack what you needed? Should I have changed for you? Would you then have stayed? Would I still have your love? If I had you face to face Would I drop my soul at your feet? Would I lay my pain bare? Would I not say a thing? Bear my cross without complaint? You could help me ease this ache By providing much needed closure You aren't willing to bestow such a gift By committing that selfless act This open wound still bleeds for you A prisoner of my own heart If only I could escape myself But I know the scars won't fade

It's been just a day since you walked away Still in shock from the deathly blow I feel like I've imagined everything you said Yet I can't stop these tears from falling Can't stop these fears from crawling inside my head What was it about me love that made it easy to leave?? Am I just trapped in a nightmare, hoping to wake up in your arms? It's been three days since you've been gone Inside my head, inside my heart, I can't seem to escape you You lurk like a shadow and everything reminds me of you I can't stop these tears from falling Can't stop these fears from crawling inside my head What was it about my love that made it easy to leave? Am I just trapped in a nightmare, hoping to wake up in your arms? It's been a week and I feel like I've been broken I try to get away from the pain, but my will has frozen Funny how long the memories linger, like mist in the air I can't stop these tears from falling Can't stop these fears from crawling inside my head What was it about me love that made it easy to leave?? Am I just trapped in a nightmare, hoping to wake up in your arms? So it's been two weeks and I finally get some peace I no longer see you everywhere I go But I feel so along without you in my life Sometimes it's hard to stop these tears from falling It's hard to stop these fears from crawling inside my head What was it about my love that made it easy to leave? Am I still trapped in a nightmare, hoping to wake up? It's been a month and life moves on around me Memories of you flicker in my mind, like lightning in a storm The clouds are still gathered, but no chance of rain It was hard to stop these tears from falling Hard to stop these fears from crawling inside my head What was it about my love that made it easy to leave? No longer trapped in a nightmare, my eyes are wide open It's been two months and I like that hand I was dealt The ache is gone but the scars remain No more nightmares to haunt my sleep No more tears falling No more fears crawling You made the choice to walk away

It kills me to not wake up to your kiss To open my eyes and not see yours To not feel your arms around me I look for you each place I go I listen for your voice I'm trying to find a way to move on But these memories won't let me go My shattered dreams left behind I'm haunted by a life once had Don't you realize the havoc you've caused? You consume my every thought, my every breath The very life I once thought complete now seems empty I'm burning with pain in my heart The fire consumes me Everything you touch, you break Everyone you love, you destroy And I can't carve you out of my heart.

Wake me from this nightmare There's something wrong with me I've been sick inside for years All this time trying to hide the pain No one knows the extent of my decay Sometimes I feel like giving in Confessing to this sin But I keep my fatal secret If I could paint you a picture You could view my tragedy Life passes by oblivious Shouldn't the clock stop turning? Shouldn't the world stop living? I watch everyone else act so normal While I sit here slowly dying

Don't sit there and pretend That we never were That you never said, "I love you" Don't sit there and pretend That you never walked away That you never broke my heart At least until the scars disappear You can't pretend That we're just long-lost friends I see past your facade I know your true motivations You know it kills me to be so close, but so far away At least until the scars disappear Just keep walking by Don't stop to say hi Don't remember that you'd love me forever Keep forgetting that we'd always be together If only these scars would disappear

I'm not gonna be there to remind you I'm not gonna be around to say I told you so I'll leave that for you You won't be able to wash the memory of me away I'm under your skin, inside your head And there's no turning back Love knows no time nor boundaries You can't escape what we shared May you always remember me. Each day when you look in the mirror, you'll see my reflection I seeped into your veins And now I'm in your blood

Have you ever been left, broken and bleeding? Tattered and torn? Abandoned and alone? Lost in the dark? Do you feel the walls closing in? Time seems to stand still Minutes stretch out into eternity You know that if the agony would ease You could find some semblance of peace But the pain is never-ending It consumes your being Defeat and failure are all you know

I keep searching Trying to find my inner self But it's like I'm empty inside When I know I have so much to share Someone help me find the way This journey weakens me I feel as though I'll never find happiness I'll never find true peace Will I ever be successful? Now I'm not so sure If I don't know who I really am How can I expect others to? This soul searching seems futile I don't want to give in to despair But defeat seems so close I know what I'm feeling Is not just a lie, but real I need to hold on, can't let go Can't give in or give up Finding true joy is at stake I must stay strong, not only for me But for the one I love Love should be everlasting But the only kind I've had was fleeting I don't know where I'm going I only hope I can find my way through it