KinkyKiki's blog: "My Rants & Raves - don't like it, don't read it!"

Judging from the kind of mail we get at Men's Health from men seeking relationship advice, I can tell you this definitively about men: When a man falls for a woman, he falls hard. Men love to be in love. While men often get stereotyped as single-minded sex-seekers, the truth is that a man's stomach churns like a slushy machine when he's in those initial stages of the perfect relationship. When you consider that half of men say that they're currently not with their soul mates, that means a heck of a lot of slushy machines are waiting to be turned on. What are they waiting for? What makes a man fall in love? After you rule out the obvious intangible laws of chemistry, attraction, and being in the right place at the right time that kick-start many a relationship, I think the question really becomes this: What makes a man fall -- and stay -- in love? About 60 percent of men deem friendship the most important thing in a relationship (sex comes in at a skimpy 8 percent, according to a national Harris Interactive poll), but let's delve a little deeper. What exactly does that mean, and what kind of woman does a man really want? With full acknowledgement that men's tastes in women are as unpredictable as the plotline of "24," these are some of things that many men value in "the one." A Woman with a Passion in Something Other Than Him Yes, it's nice to be doted over. Yes, it's nice to be pampered. Yes, it's nice to be with a woman who showers you with compliments, neck kisses, and all of her attention. But there's a virtual Great Wall of China between a fleeting, flirtatious glance and the kind of attraction that can last a lifetime. Many men say they like a woman who's immersed in something else other than the relationship -- be it her work, or her sport, or whatever her "thing" is. Why? The passion she shows for something else confirms her inherent goodness, her personal drive, her independence. All pluses in the woman we're hoping to spend a few decades with. A Woman with No Problem with Guy Time Every relationship has to choreograph the time-together dance. Once a couple elevates from casual to serious, it goes through that period when most waking and sleeping minutes are spent together. But at some point in the dance, one person will call a time out from the music of coupledom, and try to spend more time with his or her friends -- while still being careful not to step on any feet in the process. Even when they're with the most perfect woman, men still crave the occasional space to spend golfing or drinking or doing whatever (64 percent of men are happy to have the time to themselves when their wives or girlfriends have plans). Men love, appreciate, and are thankful for women who respect and endorse (and not complain about) his need to have a few testosterone mixers. Don't worry, March Madness will be over in just a few weeks! A Woman with a Strut Her strut in the bar may have been part of his initial attraction. The strut from the bedroom to the bathroom after the first night together may have been pure visual ecstasy. But the strut that happens day in and day out is one of the major attractors for a man. What do I mean by the strut? It's that attitude, that sassiness, that confidence, that charisma, that charm that shows she can be a little bold and little daring. In a recent post I talked about the line between a woman being confident and a woman being so aggressive that she turns men away, but the truth is that in certain aspects of relationships, men want women who have the strut. Men want to be with women who challenge them, who push them, and who take the lead some of the times. And that's as true in the bedroom as it is in planning their next weekend getaway. The danger? While it can be insanely attractive, that strut of confidence can also swing a man 180 degrees -- if she uses it in other places, like to flirt with other guys, to become a relationship dictator, or to pick a fight with his mom in front of the whole family. He'll point that kind of strut right out the door. A Woman with a Good Taste in Ties Okay, so we don't really care about the ties per se. But what we care about is a woman's ability to give us a little-and this is a key word-gentle guidance. I know Freudian followers will say that it's a man's need to be mothered, but it's more than that. Every relationship is a give and take, and guys will definitely take women who can warn us when our new soul patch looks stupid, who can guide us to the perfect suit and shirt combo for an upcoming job interview, who can help them make decisions without being harsh or judgmental. Guys like to project that they know what they're doing and that they don't need any help. Women who can help steer us, without aggressively grabbing the wheel, are the most treasured copilots. by David Zinczenko Got ideas? Agree? Disagree?? Let me know!

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had set their new wives straight on their duties. The first man had married a woman from South Dakota, and bragged that he had told his wife she was going to do all the dishes and house cleaning that needed done at their house. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away. The second man had married a woman from Illinois. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. He told them that the first day he didn't see any results, but the next day it was better. By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table. The third man had married an Iowa girl. He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the secondday he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see well enough out of his left eye to do the dishes and the laundry; and he thought by next week he'd be able to mow the lawn !!! Got to love them Iowa Girls!!!!!!! LOL, I am thinking maybe I should have taken this approach -

written by Shawn McKee eDiets Contributor What if your doctor prescribed you a medicine that could reduce strokes, heart and vascular disease, and the incidence of cataracts and breast cancer cells? You would take it every day, right? Well, you won’t have to see your doctor for this remedy, but you may want to visit your favorite bartender. It’s fairly common knowledge that beer has a relaxing effect on the body and can reduce stress, but there are a myriad of other health benefits of this potent potable that are not as apparent at your local happy hour. There has never been better reasons to enjoy a cold one. So test your beer health IQ. The Healthy, Happy Hour Beer Quiz: True or false? Beer is good for your heart. True: A Dutch study conducted by TNO Nutrition and Food Research found that a known reference for predicting future cardiovascular disease, blood C-reactive protein (CRP), declined by 35 percent after three weeks of regular beer consumption compared with levels after three weeks of drinking non-alcoholic beer. The same study found that levels of HDL or "good" cholesterol rose by 11 percent during the same period. Beer also contains vitamin B6, which prevents the build-up of an amino acid called homocysteine that has been linked to heart disease. Also, the Archives of Internal Medicine published an article confirming the benefits for women drinking alcohol. Data was collected from more than 70,000 nurses aged 25 to 42 whose health histories were tracked from 1989. Younger women who drink two or three alcoholic beverages a week have a lower risk of developing high blood pressure than women who do not drink alcohol. The women in the group who drank two or three alcoholic drinks a week had a 14 percent lower risk of developing high blood pressure than those who abstained. Beer will reduce the chance of stroke. True: One drink a day for women or up to two drinks a day for men will reduce your chances of strokes, heart and vascular disease. Strokes are the third-leading cause of death in the U.S. and the leading cause of serious, long-term disabilities. It is said that light to moderate drinkers will decrease their chances of suffering a stroke by 20 percent. You should give your grandma a beer. True: Don’t load her up a beer bong yet or take her to “kill a keg” night at you local pub, but in moderation, beer has been proven to have positive effects on elderly people. It helps promote blood vessel dilation, sleep and urination. Beer makes you funnier and more attractive to the opposite sex. False: I’m sorry; beer won’t make you funnier, although it will lower inhibitions and may make your bad jokes seem funnier to your inebriated amigos. In this state of lowered inhibitions, “beer-goggles” can take over and make that 4.5 at the end of the bar seem like an eleven. You’ll see clearly in the morning. (Again, sorry.) Beer is both fat-free and cholesterol-free. True: Check the label. Nutritionally, a beer is similar to a can of soda in its calories and carbs, but can your cola curb cancer? Beer is good for breasts. True: Research by scientists at the Universidade do Porto in Portugal found that polyphenols in wine and beer appeared to decrease breast cancer cells significantly. Numerous other experiments have shown that certain polyphenols, mainly flavonoids, can protect against heart disease and have anticancer, antiviral and antiallergic properties. The Portuguese study concluded that xanthohumol, which is found in beer, was the most potent polyphenol over breast cancer cell growth; it showed its effect more rapidly and at a lower concentration than the others. Beer could save the Three Blind Mice. True: John Trevithick, Ph.D., and Maurice Hirst, Ph.D., of the University of Western Ontario, conducted a study that suggests beer reduced the incidence of cataracts in mice (but increased their propensity to “go wild” and get tattoos they’ll regret later in life -- my own inference). If the same cataract protection occurs in humans, it would be especially beneficial to people with diabetes. “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Benjamin Franklin said it; it must be true. Beer has many healthy benefits when enjoyed in moderation. One or two beers a day can keep you healthy, but don’t overindulge or you’ll watch your beer belly blossom. Drink responsibly. Cheers!