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THE TWELVE DAYS OF FUBAR Written by: Unchained Melody 12-21-07 On the first day of Fubar Baby Jesus sent to me A Bouncer checking I.D. On the second day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the third day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D.. On the fourth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Four Cherry Bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D.. On the fifth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the sixth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the seventh day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Seven Secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D.. On the eighth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Eight Maids a mumming, Seven secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the ninth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Nine NSFW photos, Eight Maids a mumming, Seven Secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the tenth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Ten points per picture, Nine NSFW photos Eight Maids a mumming Seven secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D.. On the eleventh day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Eleven Profile comments, Ten points per picture, Nine NSFW photos, Eight Maids a mumming, Seven Secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy bears, And a Bouncer checking I.D. On the twelfth day of Fubar, Baby Jesus sent to me Twelve Dip shits down rating Eleven Profile comments, Ten points per picture, Nine NSFW photos, Eight Maids a mumming, Seven Secret crushes, Six guys to rate, Five Diamond rings, Four Cherry bombs, Three FU bucks, Two Teddy Bears, And A BOUNCER CHECKING I.D.! Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! ~Melody

25. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye. 24. Her Teeth Was Stained, But Her Heart Were Pure. 23. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away? 22. I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling. 21. I Just Bought A Car From A Guy That Stole My Girl, But The Car Don't Run So I Figure We're Even. 20. I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You. 19. I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well. 18. I Still Miss You, Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better. 17. I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win. 16. I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight. 15. I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here 14. I've Got Tears In My Ears From Lyin' On My Back and Cryin' Over You. 13. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You. 12. If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now. 11. Mama Get A Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head). 10. My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love You. 9. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him. 8. Please Bypass This Heart. 7. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger. 6. You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat. 5. You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly. 4. If the Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me. 3. She's Actin' Single and I'm Drinkin' Doubles. 2. She's Looking Better After Every Beer. And the Number 1 Country and Western song of all Time is... 1. I Haven't Gone To Bed With Any Ugly Women But I've Sure Woke Up With A Few

Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone, In a one bedroom house made of plaster & stone. I had come down the chimney, with presents to give and to see just who in this home did live As I looked all about, a strange sight I did see, no tinsel, no presents, not even a tree. No stocking by the fire, just boots filled with sand. On the wall hung pictures of a far distant land. With medals and badges, awards of all kind, a sobering thought soon came to my mind. For this house was different, unlike any I'd seen. This was the home of a U.S. Marine. I'd heard stories about them, I had to see more, so I walked down the hall and pushed open the door. And there he lay sleeping, silent, alone, Curled up on the floor in his one-bedroom home. He seemed so gentle, his face so serene, Not how I pictured a U.S. Marine. Was this the hero, of whom I’d just read? Curled up in his poncho, a floor for his bed? His head was clean-shaven, his weathered face tan. I soon understood, this was more than a man. For I realized the families that I saw that night, owed their lives to these men, who were willing to fight. Soon around the Nation, the children would play, And grown-ups would celebrate on a bright Christmas day. They all enjoyed freedom, each month and all year, because of Marines like this one lying here. I couldn’t help wonder how many lay alone, on a cold Christmas Eve, in a land far from home. Just the very thought brought a tear to my eye. I dropped to my knees and I started to cry. He must have awoken, for I heard a rough voice, "Santa, don't cry, this life is my choice I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more. My life is my God, my country, my Corps." With that he rolled over, drifted off into sleep, I couldn't control it, I continued to weep. I watched him for hours, so silent and still. I noticed he shivered from the cold night's chill. So I took off my jacket, the one made of red, and covered this Marine from his toes to his head. Then I put on his T-shirt of scarlet and gold, with an eagle, globe and anchor emblazoned so bold. And although it barely fit me, I began to swell with pride, and for one shining moment, I was Marine Corps deep inside. I didn't want to leave him so quiet in the night, this guardian of honor so willing to fight. But half asleep he rolled over, and in a voice clean and pure, said "Carry on, Santa, it's Christmas Day, all secure." One look at my watch and I knew he was right, Merry Christmas my friend, Semper Fi and goodnight.

Superstore A store that sells new husbands has just opened in Sydney, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. >The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs. She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor,where the sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids. That's nice", she thinks, "but I want more." So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework. "Oh !" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!" Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads: Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. PLEASE NOTE: To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street. The first floor has wives that love sex. The rest of the floors have never been visited Thank you ~* LilMsPervette *~ Sign My Guest Book &hearts The Sisterhood &hearts

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Really freaking facts of 911 Now listen to me! Read through all of this, and don't stop till you hit the bottom, or you'll regret it! UNITED WE STAND 1) New York City has 11 letters 2) Afghanistan has 11 letters. 3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin Towers in 1993) has 11 letters. 4) George W Bush has 11 letters. 5) The two twin towers make an "11" This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets more interesting: 2) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number 11. 3) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11 4) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers, was carrying 65 passengers. 6+5 = 11 5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9 + 1+ 1 = 11 6) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number 911. 9 + 1 + 1 = 11. Sheer coincidence..?! Read on and make up your own mind: 1) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was 254. >2 + 5 + 4 = 11. 2) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year. Again 2 + 5 + 4 = 11. 3) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 = 11. 4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers incident. Sheer coincidence..?! Read on and make up your own mind: Now this is where things get totally eerie: The most recognised symbol for the US, after the Stars & Stripes, is the Eagle. The following verse is taken from the Quran, the Islamic holy book: "For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced: for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace." That verse is number 9.11 of the Quran. Still uncovinced about all of this..?! Try this and see how you feel afterwards, it made my hair stand on end: Open Microsoft Word and do the following, TRY THIS FOR REAL I DID IT AND IT SCARED THE LIVING CRAP OUT OF MEE!!!!!!! 1. Type in capitals Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first plane to hit one of the Twin Towers. 2. Highlight the Q33 NY. [ DO THiS iN WORD ] 3. Change the font size to 48. 4. Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS{scariest part of all} Extremely scary huh? *bulletin from* baby_girl The ÌñÐêþêñÐêñ† Fåmïlψ ~ Member of the CFR!!!~ I love you Sgt Jay Davidson

@ fubar if ur too lazy to check urself i did!!

LEAVE YOUR SHIRT FOR HER TO SLEEP IN LEAVE HER CUTE TEXT MESSAGES. KISS HER IN FR0NT 0F Y0UR FRIENDS. TRUST HER 0VER EVERY0NE ELSE. TELL HER SHE L00KS BEAUTIFUL. L00K HER IN THE EYES WHEN Y0U TALK T0 HER. LET HER MESS WITH Y0UR HAIR. MESS WITH HER HAIR. JUST WALK AR0UND WITH HER. INCLUDE HER IN ALL THINGS Y0U D0. F0RGIVE HER F0R HER MISTAKES. L00K AT HER LIKE SHE'S THE 0NLY GIRL Y0U SEE. TICKLE HER EVEN WHEN SHE SAYS ST0P. H0LD HER HAND EVEN WHEN Y0U ARE AROUND Y0UR FRIENDS. WHEN SHE STARTS SWEARING AT Y0U TELL HER Y0U L0VE HER. LET HER FALL ASLEEP IN Y0UR ARMS. GET HER MAD, THEN KISS HER. TEASE HER & LET HER TEASE Y0U BACK. STAY UP WITH HER ALL NIGHT WHEN SHES SICK. WATCH HER FAV0RITE M0VIE WITH HER KISS HER F0REHEAD. GIVE HER THE W0RLD. WRITE HER LETTERS. LET HER WEAR Y0UR CL0THES. WHEN SHES SAD, HANG 0UT WITH HER. LET HER KN0W SHE'S IMP0RTANT. LET HER TAKE ALL THE PH0T0S 0F Y0U SHE WANTS. KISS HER IN THE RAIN. CALL HER EVERY NIGHT. AND WHEN Y0U FALL IN L0VE WITH HER, TELL HER. AND WHEN Y0U D0 TELL HER. L0VE HER LIKE Y0U NEVER L0VED BEF0RE. baby_girl The ÌñÐêþêñÐêñ† Fåmïlψ ~ Member of the CFR!!!~

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WHO HOOKS YA UP??LOVES HORNY!!!!!!!(D) HORNY???JUGGALO!TWIZTIDMONKEYS(hubby)JUGGALO MAFIA!!!!!(DON-MeGa)

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A~Z of Friendship.... A)ccepts you as you are B)elieves in "you" C)alls you just to say "HI" D)oesn't give up on you E)nvisions the whole of you (even the unfinished parts) F)orgives your mistakes G)ives unconditionally H)elps you I)nvites you over J)ust "be" with you K)eeps you close at heart L)oves you for who you are M)akes a difference in your life N)ever Judges O)ffer support P)icks you up Q)uiets your fears R)aises your spirits S)ays nice things about you T)ells you the truth when you need it U)nderstands you V)alues you W)alks beside you X)-plains thing you don't understand Y)ells when you won't listen and Z)aps you back to reality Karma (-: Impaired member :-) Fubar hubby to ice princess

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Mary had a little pig, She kept it fat and plastered; And when the price of pork went up, She shot the little bastard. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, Between two hunks of bread. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid Jill forgot the pill And now they have a son. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair. Said Simple Simon to the Pie man, "What have you got there?" Said the Pie man unto Simon, "Pies, you Dumb Ass ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings' horses, And all the kings' men. Had scrambled eggs, For breakfast again. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle, All over the bedside clock. The little dog laughed to see such fun. Then died of electric shock. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie, Kissed the girls and made them cry. And when the boys came out to play, He kissed them too 'cause he was gay. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was a little girl who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very, very good. But when she was bad........ She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car. he posted it Mike Hocksbig

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