cupcakesdemons's blog: "whatever"

2day we lost a really good man he wasnt a BLS FAM MEMBER but he got to hear some of ZAKK's tunes and his favorite was IN THIS RIVER AND SPOKE IN THE WHEEL my great grand FARTHER died today my mom and i found him so say pray for him and us THANKS AND LIKE ALWAYS SDMF 4 LIFE

THIS IS TO MY GREAT GRAND FARTHER HE PASSED AWAY TODAY MY MOM AND I FOUND HIM HIS NAME WAS HOWAD JOHNSON AND I WANT HIM TO KNOW I LOVED HIM ILL SEE AGAIN OLD MAN. WE ALL KNOW DEATH COMES AND GOES BUT YOU NEVER NOTICE TILL IT HITS HOME WELL TO TODAY DEATH HIT MY FAMLIY AND I KNOW IT BETTER BUT I CANT STOP THE TEARS SOME TEARS OF JOY THAT HIS PAIN AND SUFFERING ARE OVER SOME TEARS OF SADDNESS KNOWING THAT I CANT SAY THE THANGS TO YOU THAT I WANTED TO. YOU WATCH ME GROW FROM A LIL BOY TO A MAN IN THAT VERY HOUSE WHERE YOU LOST YOUR LIFE I LOVE U PAPA YOU WERE MORE THAT MY GREATGRAND PA YOU WERE MY DAD WHEN I HAD NONE YOU WATCH ME WHEN MY MOM WAS AT WORK BUT NOW I DONT WANT TO DO WITHOUT YOU. JUST LIKE THE WIND DEATH CAN BE CUS MOM SAW YOU THIS MORING AND I SAW LAST WEEK AND NOW NO MORE TIMES WE CAN DRINK TOGETHER NO MORE TALKS BOUT LIFE AND YOUR GREAT GREAT GRAND KIDS I HAVENT CRIED IN A LONG TIME BUT TO DAY MANY TEARS WE DROP FOR YOU PAPA I FOUND HIM IN HIS FAVORITE CHAIR BY HIS BED WITH THE TV ON CHANNEL 10 LIKE HE LIKED IT LOOKED TO BE A SWIFT DEATH LIKE HE FELT NO PAIN . NO WORDS I CAN WRITE WELL EVER BRING HIM BACK TO ME AND I MAY NEVER GET OVER IT CUS I DIDNT DO WHAT I NEEDED TO DO WHEN HE WAS HERE I SORRY PAPA BUT I LOVED MORE THAN U WILL EVER KNOW

Am I mad cus i cut a fast nip at my wrist and all the pain of days weeks months and years goes away, and a feeling of joy and freedom takes over my body none like I've ever felt, but scar are lefted behind their left behind to remind me that this wourld is painful, this world has will turn its back on you , and this world won't miss you if you're gone, but i slit that wonderful blade arcoss my bare flesh i remember not that the is fail and dark i think of the next time i can pull a beartiful blade from the box and relieve my suffering, but to these people that dont unberstand our method I say ours because there are more like me who fight pain with pain they call us dumb, they call crazy, they call us cutters, Yes im a cutter but cutting is me Bayer, my advil,my asprin if you will, but will the outside world ever stop turning? no so i wont stop cutting. to the ones who read this poem and jugde me i dnt mind that u jugde but know that what u say wont change me and one day someone love just might turn out to be a cutter will try to help them or make it worse ?

well yet again i have a heart fulla hate this time its toward people who dont like cus of my skin but i guess we cnt change the way some folks think but when your being stupid fucks with my life and makes the people i care 4 upset then i get pissed off

man this month has been wow dat all i can say i hope the months and years get better as they come and go and i hope yall get better 2 have fun with life take her easy and if shes easy take her twice

BLACK LABEL SOCIETY, PANTERA, SLIPKNOT, MEGADETH, BLACK SABBATH, AC/DC, TYPE O NEGATIVE MUSHROOM HEAD, RAMM STEIN, AMON AMRTH, CHILDREN OF BODOM, MY DYING BRIDE, HELL YEAH, REBEL MEETS REBEL, JOB FOR A COWBOY, DROPKICK MURPHYS, THREE 6 MAFIA, PASTOR TROY, HAYSTACK, BLAZE, BOONDOX, JAMES BLUNT, KIZZ, OLD OLD METALLICA, MOTORHEAD, ETC ETC ETC

thanks for all of you thanks for rates adds comments pics comments all dat great shit if i havent done it tooo trust i will wouldnt wnt folks to think i dnt show no love when love has been shwon to me so hang tight and ill get to it well if any of yall have ?'s or jus wanna caht hit me up anytime otay by bye

wow new friends so fast dats great i hope people dnt get confused when they see my pics yea i'm blk and yea i knw its a confederate flag i'm a southern its where i'm from its my heritage it aint nuffin to do with color any ?s ask me thanks

hey hows everyone i'm fine i'm new looking for friends have a nice day