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To commemorate her 69th birthday on October 1, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefi t of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was "My Favorite Things" from the legendary movie "Sound Of Music". Here are the lyrics she used: Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting, Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings, Bundles of magazines tied up in string, These are a few of my favorite things. Cadillacs and cataracts ,and hearing aids and glasses, Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses, Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings, These are a few of my favorite things. When the pipes leak, When the bones creak, When the knees go bad, I simply remember my favorite things, And then I don't feel so bad. Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions, No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions, Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring, These are a few of my favorite things. Back pains, confused brains, and no need for sinnin', Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin', And we won't mention our short shrunken frames, When we remember our favorite things. When the joints ache, When the hips break, the eyes grow dim, Then I remember the great life I've had, And then I don't feel so bad. (Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.) Please share Ms. Andrews' clever wit and humor with others who would appreciate it.

Worst Family Feud Answers

Question: Name a former President that most people would say is honest. #1 Answer: Lincoln Worst Answer: Nixon ----- Question: Besides San Francisco, name a city that begins with the word San. #1 Answer: San Diego Worst Answer: Seattle ----- Question: Name a slang term used for important people. #1 Answer: V.I.P. Worst Answer: Buddy ----- Question: Name something packrats have a hard time throwing out. #1 Answer: Photos Worst Answer: Corn ----- Question: Name something that might annoy a gardener. #1 Answer: Bugs Worst Answer: Not getting paid on time ----- Question: Name a reason a man might send his wife flowers. #1 Answer: Anniversary Worst Answer: Happy divorce ----- Question: Name a term used in football. #1 Answer: Touchdown Worst Answer: Fastbreak ----- Question: Name a special request people ask for when making a dinner reservation. #1 Answer: Non-smoking Worst Answer: A menu ----- Question: Name someone you wouldn't want to get a phone call from. #1 Answer: The police Worst Answer: Your son ----- Question: Name a classical music composer everyone knows. #1 Answer: Mozart Worst Answer: Julio Iglesias ----- Question: Tell me something specific you should drink a lot of when you're sick. #1 Answer: Water Worst Answer: Alcohol ----- Question: Name something you'd hate to find at the end of your nose. #1 Answer: Pimple Worst Answer: Lint ----- Question: Name the worst kind of shoe to run a marathon in. #1 Answer: High heels Worst Answer: Scuba flippers ----- Question: Name something a person wouldn't want living in their house. #1 Answer: Relatives Worst Answer: Mold ----- Question: Name a musician who goes by one name. #1 Answer: Madonna Worst Answer: Reba McIntyre ----- Question: Name something you think would be difficult about being a waiter. #1 Answer: Taking orders Worst Answer: Falling down ----- Question: Name a unit of currency used in a country other than the U.S. #1 Answer: Peso Worst Answer: Ampere ----- Question: Name a reason why a woman might not want to kiss her boyfriend. #1 Answer: Bad breath Worst Answer: She doesn't love him that much. ----- Question: Name something you do in front of your husband that you probably never did when you were dating. #1 Answer: Undress Worst Answer: Make out ----- Question: Name a complaint you might have about the pizza that was just delivered. #1 Answer: It's cold Worst Answer: It went to the wrong address ----- Question: Name an animal many people are scared of. #1 Answer: Snake Worst Answer: Boar ----- Question: Name something you need to play Scrabble. #1 Answer: Letters Worst Answer: Dice ----- Question: Name the age when a man might start to lose a lot of hair. #1 Answer: 30 Worst Answer: 14 ----- Question: Name the best month to schedule a wedding. #1 Answer: June Worst Answer: Summer

Cookie Salesmanship

On his way in to our local grocery, a man was stopped by a gaggle of small girls selling Girl Scout cookies. When he said Yes, he'd take a box, a Brownie asked, "What kind?" Helpfully he inquired, "Oh, let's see - which is your slowest seller?" The tiny spokesperson thought a minute, then, pointing toward another girl, stating emphatically, "Brittany!"
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