Ryan Da Fox's blog: "As I lie here"

Lately I've been wandering Off the narrow path You’ve given me so many things that I've never had And all in all I know it's you that always pulls me through If you reach deep inside you’ll see my heart is true ‘Cause I hate the way I feel tonight And I know I need you in my life Yes I hate the way I feel inside And I promise to make the sacrifice The world I know is pulling me More and more each day I feel like the odd man out as I begin to pray Spiteful eyes are watching me With everything I do In the midst of darkness Lord My spirit calls for you You know sometimes deep inside I feel like this 'Cause I hate the way I feel tonight And I know I need you in my life Yes I hate the way I feel inside And I promise to make the sacrifice 'Cause I hate the way I feel tonight And I know I need you in my life Yes I hate the way I feel inside And I promise to make the sacrifice

Alone again again alone Patiently waiting by the phone Hoping that you will call me home The pain inside my love denied Hopes and dreams swallowed by pride Everything I need it lies in you ‘Cause I’m broken I know I need you now ‘Cause deep inside I'm broken You see the way I live I know I know your heart is broken When I turn away I need to be broken Take the pain away I question why you chose to die When you knew your truth I would deny You look at me The tears begin to fall And all in all faith is blind But I fail time after time Daily in my sin I take your life All the hate deep inside Slowly covering my eyes All these things I hide Away from you again All this fear holding me My heart is cold and I believe Nothing’s gonna change Until I'm whole again

As I lie here tossing in my bed Lost in my fears remembering what you said And I try to hide the truth within The mask of myself shows its face again Still I lie time and time again Will you deny me when we meet again? And I feel like I'm falling Farther every day But I know that you're there Watching over me And I feel like I'm drowning The waves crashing over me But I know that your love It will set me free As I find truth where I found it times before As I search for your hope I'm finding so much more And I try to be more like you And I deny myself to prove my heart is true I hear your voice calling The time has come for me Inside this life I’m living There’s nothing left for me My mind is slowly fading So far away from me Each time I start crawling You’re there watching me

Cold Lying in my bed Staring into darkness Lost I hear footsteps overhead And my thoughts return Again Like a child who's run away And won't be coming back Time keeps passing by As night turns into day I'm so far away And so alone I need to see your face To keep me sane To make we whole Try to stay alive Until I hear your voice I'm gonna lose my mind Someone tell me why I chose this life This superficial lie Constant compromise Endless sacrifice Pain It saddens me to know The helplessness you feel Your light Shines on my soul While a thousand candles Burn Outside this barren room The rain is pouring down The emptiness inside Is growing deeper still You're so far away And so alone You long for love's embrace To keep you sane To make you whole Try to stay alive Until I hear your voice I'm gonna lose my mind Someone tell me why I chose this life This superficial lie Constant compromise Endless sacrifice Moments wasted Isolated Time escaping Endless sacrifice Moments wasted Isolated Time escaping Endless sacrifice Over the distance We try to make sense Of surviving together While living apart Striving for balance We rise to the challenge Of staying connected In spite of circumstance All you've forsaken And all that you've done So that I could live out This undying dream Won't be forgotten Or taken for granted I'll always remember Your endless sacrifice Moments wasted Isolated Time escaping Endless sacrifice Moments wasted Isolated Time escaping Endless sacrifice