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husband store

brand new store has just opened in New York City that sells Husbands. When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions at the entrance:- "You may visit this store ONLY ONCE!" There are 6 floors and the value of the products increase as you ascend the flights. You may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you CANNOT go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the 1st floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs. The 2nd floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids. The 3rd floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with Housework. "Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!" Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have A Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store . To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opens a New Wives store just across the street. The 1st floor has wives that love sex. The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money. The 3rd through 6th floors have NEVER BEEN VISITED

Easter

Kids

I THINK YOU'RE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS... > > A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an > attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. > > He's rather taken aback because he can't place where > he knows her from. So he says, > > "Do you know me?" To which she replies, > > "I think you're the father of one of my kids." > > Now his mind travels back to the only time he has > ever > been unfaithful to his wife and says, > > "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party > that I made love to > on the pool table with all my buddies watching while > your partner whipped > my butt with wet celery?" > > She looks into his eyes and says calmly, > > "No, I'm your son's teacher."
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