NomisSOJA's blog: "I would do anything for just a second to show what I have"

Another girl get away. I hate being jus friends. Thats all i am to every girl i met. and when i do meet someone it back fires on my ass everytime. i jus wish i could meet someone who i can relate to and be loved by. but that jus not gna happen. im to the point where i jus dont give a fuck anymore. everything around me is jus wrong. doesnt feel right at all. chris mikey n nick are the only ones i can really trust. seems like everyone eles is jus lieing to me. and i hate that. i fucking hate it. i jus wanna die. go to sleep and never wake up. come back as an animal maybe even a bird. and jus fly threw the wind and shit on peoples heads haha. specialy on fuckin romans god damn head. and all the girls who broke my heart or didnt wanna take a chance to grab it and see what love i can give.

I want her next to me in my life more than anything I have ever wanted. I wanna show her the love I want to give to her tell she dies. Be with her every moment in our little lifes. Prove to her she is more beautiful than anything and everything in the whole wide universe. Show her how much one man can love a woman. Show her love still exsist and its waiting for her if she just takes that chance. Prove that she is worth something. Worth more than anything. Worth my own life just so I can be with her for a second. But. I cant have her. I cant show her any of what i said. I cant prove anything to her. I cant spend the rest of my life with her. It hurts. It hurts when we hang out. When we talk on the phone. When she spends the night. It kills me. Seeing her with another man. I just cant take it anymore. I want her so bad. I wanna die so bad. Without her love I would die.