Grish's blog: "irked"

my head feels like its about to explode i have a million mile a minute thoughts running through my head is the one ever coming back will the other hate me if i date or chill with this person does this person only want to chill with me cause it might miss some one else off do i only want to hang with them because it might piss some one off and you know what i don't have any answers except that i want it to all stop i want to stop feeling this way i want to have good faith in people that they like me for me not for what they can get from me but that left and i'm having a hell of a time letting it back in trust is a terrible thing to have broken because it takes forever to feel comfortable with giving it out again

so just an update had a wedding to go to today we missed the wedding hit the reception helped out there had some fun had a few drinks i caught the boquet that was an experience and yeah thats about it life is pretty much the same i went back to brown for now we'll see how long i can make it last lol might put extentions in in a little bit but we'll see until then not much happening catch ya'll later M 92.5 Concert in 7 days WOOT!

good things never seem to last

date night oh i love date night date night is a wonderful night for me lol if you guys can't tell i'm in a really really good mood i had a date tonight and he's a honey and i likes him and yeah thats it for now cause i don't feel like sharing any more Meg

i stole this from some ones blog MOTORCYCLE Current mood: sad Girl: Slow down. Im scared. Guy: No this is fun. Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary! Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down! Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. *Girl hugs him* Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on yourself? its bugging me. (In the paper the next day): A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. 2 people were on it, but only 1 survived. *The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him & felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so that she would live even though it meant that he would die.

Just so EVERYONE my NSFW photos are not as revealing as you all think its basically what i had up before except i made them private because i was getting some comments that i didn't like and thank actually kinda freaked me out if you have a problem with the fact that it is only open to people on my family list i apologize but do not come off rude to me because you can't have your way and say oh well take me off your friends list because some one said no to you if you don't like delete me but really people get off my dick because if you have an issue its not mine to every one else who is on my family list feel free to rate and comment as you will much love to you all Meg

i wish i felt as happy as i let everyone think i am i wish i didn't hurt i wish he still didn't matter but no matter how much i tell my self that he doesn't it doesn't go away i'm afraid that i will always feel this way that a part of me will always belong to him and it kills me a little bit more each day i'm tiredof feeling this way until now i never realized i was capable of feeling so much pain though i think if i didn't love him as much as i still it might not be as bad but i guess that happens there are times when i wish i hated him but i don't and it hurts i wish it would all go away i wish i could drink it all away or smoke it all away but i know it won't work i tried it all it did was numb it until the next day when soberiety kicked in i don't know any more Broken" I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well I wanna hold you high and steal your pain 'Cause I'm broken when I'm open And I don't feel like I am strong enough 'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome And I don't feel right when you're gone away The worst is over now and we can breathe again I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight I wanna hold you high and steal your pain [x2] 'Cause I'm broken when I'm open And I don't feel like I am strong enough 'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome And I don't feel right when you're gone away

my life Current mood: contemplative my life right now in a lot of ways is great i'm done school looking for work have met some great new people but in that same breath i dunno i feel like i'm just exposing myself to getting screwed over again and i'm just kinda waiting for it so thats my update for now catch ya'll later M

i'm just irked i'm irritated cause it seems while every one is finding some one i'm just floating around waiting for something and some one that is no longer mine and probably won't ever be mine again and i feel lost a feeling i don't like because it means that i'm not in control that feeling has never worked out well for me. M