40 Year Old
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Female
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From
Indianapolis, IN
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Joined on December 30, 2006
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Born on December 16th
Needless to say it's strange to talk about emotions and such in public forum. Seeing as how most people are too busy or lazy to read a few paragraphs of text and most of this blog's viewers won't read the entire passage. For those who do, please don't judge. It's intangible, really.
Love: one of the strongest and most undeniable emotions tucked away in the three lbs. of mass between everyone's ears. To some, love is an emotion that rarely materializes in day-to-day life. For others, love is the keepsake that feeds and drives their life passion(s). Love is to blame for countless crimes, good and bad. Love, which is often countered by lust, is to blame for numerous assault charges, vengeance, impeachments, littering fines (throwing your newest ex's junk out of the apartment window), adultery, and in extreme cases, murder. It is the topic of many great novels, songs, plays, movies, and drunken late night conversations (or blogs such as this one). There are people who say that a man cannot love a man, and a woman cannot love a woman. There are people who say that a 78 year old woman cannot love a 19 year old man. There are people who say that I cannot love a circus chimp. [I kid, btw]. In all honesty, I bite my thumb at such persons. Love is undeniable. Sure, love can be confusing, heartbreaking, dramatic, devastating, and even toxic. But in the end, as the old time cliché reads, it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.
Love can be beautiful and powerful as well. It can move mountains. It can take a homeless man and turn him into a character straight out of a chick flick. It can calm the most savage of beasts, or at least trim their horn. Love is the reason all of us, or most of us at least, are here. Where would you be if your parents had never been in love? One of the largest religions in the world, a religion that is responsible for changing the entire planet, is based off of a man's love for "sinners". Love creates imaginary boundaries that are meant to be skewed and/or ruined. Love takes the ordinary and forces it into the realm of the extraordinary.
Why is love so important to us, you and I?
As Dr. Hannibal Lecter once noted, there are shallow rollers and there are deep rollers. Occasionally, a deep roller will match with a shallow roller, and vise versa. There are people who can go without the care and affection of another for long periods of time without blinking. Others are condemned to need, desire, and depend on such companionship.
So why all the relentless gibber gabber you ask… well I'll tell you.
Recently, in my personal life I've been stricken with an overwhelming dose of reality. The boundaries I've grown accustomed to have been skewed. My entire thought process about life has shifted because of this four letter word. What I've learned through the past few months is that love is uncertain, undeniable, and unchained. When we enter into a relationship with someone else, we ultimately have chosen to either take a path that will create terminal happiness or heartbreak. If I'm a deep roller, which I believe I am, then I will roll deep and fast until I crash. But you know what? It's worth it. Every emotion that stems from love is worth it. I've realized that when all is said and done whatever happens with any relationship is a piece of a bigger puzzle. Live, learn, and love. Be an open book, take everything in, and create whatever it is you need to be happy. I say this because when you hang your boots up at the end of each day, you will likely forget about the TPS cover letters, the angry customers, the dickhead of a boss, and the spilt milk … as long as you can love someone. ANYONE. Yourself included. I dunno, maybe I'm trying too hard to find peace and comfort with my current situation. And that's okay, right? In order to grow and develop I need to be able to understand and digest the task at hand.
If you've reached the end of this post and are completely disappointed with it, then whatever. For those of you who understand me and agree, then I'd like to shake your hand. It's all a matter of how we perceive opportunities. Above all, don't be afraid to let your true light shine through; it really is all you have.
40 Year Old
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Female
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From
Indianapolis, IN
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Joined on December 30, 2006
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Born on December 16th
Interests
im interested in almost everything... yup. life is all about learning and actually using the knowledge one has learned. i cannot sit idly anymore (though, it's nice to be lazy and i procrastinate a lot! no worries. i get what im suppose to get done), and if it appears as if i am sitting idly, well, im not. im probably contemplating something that's too profound that i usually get a bloody headache afterwards... yup. exactly.
that's my most dangerous hobby: thinking. i think too much and im quite aware of that, and people who know me know i think too much, but that's ok. apparently, i make them think harder, which makes me giggle inside coz i guess thinking is contagious!
im interested in books that leave you breathless, music that makes you want to dance, movies that leave you wanting more, and great friends who are so spectacular in their awesomeness that it's hard not to hang out with them! and yes, good food shared among friends is amazing, too.
my interests have shifted... not sure if anyone else is aware of the changes, but im beginning to realize some things. it's kind of nice. sometimes, change is frightening. other times, it's something that should be embraced. i havent quite figured out what i'm doing. oh well. playing it by ear is all what i can do.
i have too many mundane interests to list them all here so if you know me at all -even a little- you should know what i like and what i dont like.
however, i do like being pursued, giving gifts, and having a good time with friends. what i dont like is when games are played. i despised that. ever heard of "say what you mean, mean what you say"? i dont say anything that may be untrue in any way, shape, or form. at least, i try. maybe that's why i have such a hard time in saying those three words... or admitting to the fact. hmmm.
Music
music is my life.... i breathe it in and out comes out musical notes. i dont know what i would do if i didnt have music in my life... i really dont. ((sidenote: there was this one time where i took something and for a week, i heard people speak in pitch. it was odd indeed. so glad that was only a week).
anyways, i listen to all kinds of music::: classical, rock, alternative rock, punk rock, pop, jazz, country, r&b, techno, trance...
some of the artists/musicians/singers/bands that i listen to ::: THIRD EYE BLIND, REEL BIG FISH, LESS THAN JAKE, imogen heap, ACCEPTANCE, secondhand serenade, DAUGHTRY, fort minor, STREETLIGHT MANIFESTO, linkin park, holly brook, jupiter sunrise, disturbed, FALL OUT BOY, STAIND, korn, utada hikaru, angela zhang, rainie yang, keith urban, dixie chicks, the doors, SNOW PATROL, THE BEATLES, kelly clarkson, shakira, nelly furtado, SUBLIME, the fray, christina aguilera, sean paul, nirvana, james blunt, RAY CHARLES, mozart, bach, chopin, jimmy eat world, incubus, daniel powter, green day, nickleback, nick lachey, ETTA JAMES, duke ellington, santana, michelle branch, anna nalick, emiliana torrini, mae, pussycat dolls, rihanna, depeche mode, craig david, led zeppelin, DIANA KRALL, red hot chili peppers, jay chow, avenged sevenfold, JAMIE CULLUM, trapt, crossfade, JACK'S MANNEQUIN, something corporate, dashboard confessional, matchbox twenty, rob thomas, the verve, frou frou, ludacris, etc...
favorite stations ::: npr, wzpl, x103... i tend to radio surf, but those are the top three that i listen to.
Movies
i like all kinds of movies: romantic, comedy, drama, thrillers (some), some scary movies i guess, but i'll be more along the lines of hiding behind a pillow or cuddling up to the next person coz i dont want to see the scary parts.... and whatever else that looks interesting...
the royal tenenbaums, shawshank redemption, serenity, dodgeball, cruel intentions, the life aquatic, i heart huckabees... peter jackson's the lord of the rings rocked my world! props to pete and to weta and to the cast and everyone else!!! and the matrix trilogy... nice. i want to do that, too. i want to fly and dodge bullets like that! anger management was interesting. so was every other sandler movie (minus punch-drunk love or spanglish... those were not too stellar), the hot chick (i'm a filipino jew-rob schneider), the sleeping dictionary (for all you jessica alba fans out there a must-see i believe), honey, you got served, big fish, finding nemo, pirates of the caribbean, secret window, the ring (please dont call me to say those words... creepy film yo), the italian job, sandlot, blue collar comedy tour 1&2, life as a house, casablanca, shall we dance, chicago, constantine, nicholas nickleby, tomb raider, the mummy, ray, runaway jury, the scorpion king, s.w.a.t., gone in sixty seconds, remember the titans, xxx, mona lisa smile, fruits basket, princess mononoke, spirited away, sin city, 21 grams, cant hardly wait, almost famous, lost in translation, the wedding date, first wives club, old school, the fast and the furious, tears of the sun, the bachelor, sahara, the wedding planner, wedding crashers, time to kill, grumpy old men, drumline, breakin all the rules, memoirs of a geisha, from hell, the chronicles of riddick, and no, i've never seen hoosiers, indiana jones, schindler's list, and i've been told i should watch them. i think... hmmmmmm there's more movies, but my mind is drawing a blank.
