DEVINES MOMMY's blog: "POETRY!"

Praying to God! Single mother struggling Wondering how she’s going to feed her baby Just laid off from her job No money in the bank Bills need to be paid And got a new one in the mail today Only one thing on her mind Feeding, clothing and paying for the life insurance for her baby Can’t get food stamps Don’t qualify! Can’t get assistance Don’t qualify! Unemployment if qualify Not even enough to provide for her child! Baby daddy might as well say a dead beat I guess if I was his cousin’s baby momma (baby daddy’s new girl) then I might get some help!! His family doesn’t even call to check up on the baby Her family can’t help out They so far into debt they can barley provide for them selves Sitting back trying to get a grip on things in her life Losing her mind Stress on high Life insurance $20.00 a month Baby food $.99 or $1.09 a jar Baby juice $2.25 a bottle A months supply of diapers and wipes $55.00 Clothing! Too damn much! Trying not to turn tricks! Trying to keep her self clean! Trying to not show her goodies for everyone to see! But looking into her daughter eyes She knows that’s not what she wants to tell her daughter When she gets older So all she can do is pray to God to give her the strength To not loose control of what she has left of her life

UNSPOKE WORDS! BRUSES ALL UP & DOWN HER BODY MAKEUP & CLOTHES CAN'T HIDE TEARS RUNNING DOWN HER FACE A BROKEN HEART IS THE LEAST OF HER PROBLEMS A BABY UNBORN AN ABUSIVE BOYFRIEND SCARED FOR HER LIFE SHE DESIDES TO RUN RUNS AS FAR & AS FAST AS POSSIBLE BUT THERE'S NO WHERE TO HIDE HE FINDS HER AND BEATS THE HELL OUT OF HER FOR THE LAST TIME "A YOUNG WOMAN ABOUT 24 YEARS OLD,NAME UNKNOWN, PREGNANT WAS FOUND MURDERED TODAY!" - NEWS REPORTER A MOTHER IDENTIFIES HER BEATEN, TORTURED, LIFELESS REMAINS OF HER DAUGHTER SHE SCREAMS "THAT'S MY BABY! WHO DID THIS TO HER? WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?" BUT IN THE BACK OF HER MIND SHE ALREADY KNOWS WHO "MOMMA HE BEATS ME!" "BABY GIRL YOU SHOULD STAY WITH HIM. HE'S A GOOD MAN. WHO CAN PROVIDE FOR YOU. YOU MUST NOT MAKE HIM MAD! HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH HONEY!" NOW AT THE FUNERAL EVERYONE IN TEARS THE PREACHER ASKS FOR ANYONE WHO WOULD LIKE TO SAY WHAT THEY REMEMBER THE MOST ABOUT HER THIS WAS THE TIME ALL THE WAY IN THE BACK THE BOYFRIEND WALKS UP TO THE FRONT "I REMEMBER HER BEAUTIFUL LAUGH AND SEXY SMILE. THE FIRST TIME I SAW HER SHE SASHAYED HER WAY IN TO THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE AND ASKED FOR DIRECTIONS. FROM THAT MOMNET ON I KNEW THAT WE WOULD BE TOGETHER FO EVER! I LOVED HER SO MUCH" "LOVED HER!! YA RIGHT! YOU ARE THE BASTARD WHO KILLED HER! THE ONE WHO DID THIS TO HER!" BUT WORDS UNSPOKEN UNSPOKEN WORDS A MURDER GETS AWAY FREE ANOTHER COULD DIE BECAUSE NO ONE WOULD STAND UP FOR WHAT THEY KNEW WAS WRONG!! A DAUGHTER MISSED A SISTER LOVED A AUNTIE REMEMBERD A FRIEND ADORED A CHILD UNBORN!!!

“I CAN’T KEEP DOING THIS TO MYSELF” I CANT KEEP DOIN THIS TO MYSELF, I'M LIVIN A LIE I SAY I DONT CARE MOST OF THE TIME, I MIGHT SOUND HAPPY BUT I'M NOT, I HURT AND CRY ON THE INSIDE, AND DONT SHOW IT ON THE OUTSIDE CUZ IT HURTS TOO BAD, BUT I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT THIS CUZ THE MAN I LOVED DONT WANT TO BE WIT ME I DONT REALLY CARE BUT AT THE SAME TIME I DO BECAUSE IT KILLS ME ON THE INSIDE TO KNOW THAT HE AINT HERE BY MY SIDE HE TOLD ME THAT HE WOULD NEVER BREAK MY HEART BUT HE DID HE HURT ME SO BAD I JUST DONT WANT TO BE ALONE ANYMORE SOMTIMES I THINK ABOUT WHAT IF I WASN’T HERE NO MORE I THINK ABOUT IT MORE AND MORE EVERYDAY BECAUSE HE AINT HERE ANYMORE, I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO HE TOLD ME THAT HE CARES AND HES SORRY FOR HURTIN ME, BUT I SAY THAT IF HE WAS REALLY SORRY HE WOULD BE HERE RIGHT NOW I GET SAD EVERYTIME I LOOK AT HIS PICTURE AND I DONT KNOW WHY BECAUSE HE HURT ME BUT I CANT HELP IT WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU DID ANY AND EVERYTHING FOR SOMEONE THAT THEY ASKED YOU TO DO EVEN IF IT WAS THE SIMPLEST SHIT BUT YOU DID IT JUST CUZ YOU LIKED HIM THAT MUCH AND THAT PERSON TOOK YOUR KINDNESS FOR WEAKNESS HOW WOULD YOU FELL IF THAT PERSON TOLD YOU THAT THEY LIKED YOU A HELL OF ALOT, AND THEN JUST TOOK YOUR HEART AND BROKE IT INTO A MILLION PIECES, AND STEPED ON IT? I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE WITHOUT HIM BY MY SIDE I HAVE NEVER LOVED ANOTHER AS MUCH AS I LOVED HIM AND I PROBLRY NEVER WILL AND I WILL NEVER BE HAPPY TILL I'M WITH HIM AGAIN BUT THIS IS THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT HIM BUT I KNOW HE DOESN’T LIKES ME ANYMORE, BECAUSE HE ALWAYS SAYS, YES, NO, KINDA, MAYBE, I DONT KNOW, ABOUT GETTIN BACK TOGETHER WITH ME, AND I AM TIRED OF MY LIFE AND THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING, NOTHIN GOES THE WAY I NEED OR WANT THEM TO GO, BUT THEN AGAIN WHOS LIFE DOES? I LOVE HIM AND ALWAYS WILL, I WILL BE HERE WAITIN FOR HIM TO JUMP OUT OF MYCLOSET AND SURPRIZE ME, GO TO WORK WITH ME, SLEEP WITH ME, SPEND EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY WITH ME, LIKE HE USED TO, BUT I DONT THINK THAT WILL EVER HAPPEN AGAIN SO I GUESS I'M GONNA HAVE TO MOVE ON, EVEN THOUGH I DONT WANT TOO!!!!!

SOMEDAY SOMEDAY YOU'LL CRY FOR ME LIKE I CRIED FOR YOU SOMEDAY YOU'LL MISS ME LIKE I MISSED YOU SOMEDAY YOU'LL NEED ME LIKE I NEEDED YOU SOMEDAY YOU'LL LOVE ME BUT... I WON'T LOVE YOU BACK SOMEDAY YOU'LL WANT ME BACK AND ILL TELL YOU TO KISS MY ASS!!!!!

ANGEL OR DEVIL? I'M YOUR ANGEL, BUT I CAN BE DESIRED, TURN YOUR WORLD INSIDE OUT, MARK YOU WITH MY FYRE I CAN PULL YOU BACK WITH A WORD OR PHRASE I KNOW YOU, YOUR PLEASURES TAKE YOU INSIDE THIS CRAZE. I'M YOUR DEVIL, TEMPT YOU WITH MY LUST, TILL YOUR FILLED WITH ONLY ME, MY VOICE IN YOUR HEART A MUST TAKE YOU PUT THEN DOWN, MAKE YOU SMILE THEN RAGE, SOOTH YOUR SAVAGE SOUL, THEN TURN ANOTHER PAGE I SAY "I WILL" THEN I DON'T I KNOW I CAN BE A TEASE, BUT THERE IS ONLY YOU FOR ME, ONLY "YOU" WILL I, CAN I PLEASE I RUN, THEN I RETURN DON'T THINK I DON'T TRY, I'M HARD THEN SOFT, MY SILENT MOURNFUL CRY BOUGHT AND SOLD, INTO THIS WILD WORLD, YOU CAN COUNT ON ME, ANGEL OR DEVIL, BABY, IM YOUR GIRL!!!!!

My Arabesque Man My arabesque man ignites my every desire. If he was mari-j, I couldn't get any higher. He's a true warrior that stand for all that is true and real. A very sophisticated man with a hint of thug appeal. My Man's 5'5", 155 lbs of solid mocha muscle. He doesn't mind working honestly in the land of the corporate hustle. He gives me what I need without a question. He mends my pain without one word mentioned. His love and respect for me is like no other. He's one of few left that honors his woman, as he, his mother. My legs never stop quivering from his intelligent conversation, He makes me feel sexy even when I know my hair "aint" happenin'. He adores every inch of my pale soft skin, I ask him what he loves about me? he says, "where do I begin?" I honestly thought good men was extinct, he has restored my faith, hallelujah, I believe. Seeing myself in his eyes, I love what I see, and I wept uncontrollably when he asked, "Will you marry me?" He has respected my rule of "No sex before marriage." Our wedding night is approaching, Ya'll, I sure hope he's ready. I'm giving him the very essence of me as much as I can. THANK YOU, THANK YOU JESUS FOR GIVING ME MY ARABESQUE MAN!!!!

This woman knows her worth My worth is unmentionable; You can NOT put a price on me Portuguese with God's love to proclaim. White skinned sista with hazel colored eyes. Oh yes we come in different colors, shapes, and sizes. A very proud woman, A true artifact of class. You could not rate me with a dirty coin. A dime piece?!!! PLEASE I will surely pass. I love and fear God, There's no shame in my game. Wont was a second ignoring a man calling me baby, ma, or shorty... My mother already gave me a name. You can't determine my being a woman from the wiggle in my behind, But do it by how I respect people whether they are cripple, crazy, or blind. For Jesus is love and he surely loves you and me. And for that, I love myself... I hope there are a few more sistas out there like me.

A Woman's Dream & Fantasy He has the body of a GOD Eye's of an Angel Lips out of this world A mind oh so Intelligent And oh so Sophisticated He is so deep It takes a real woman to understand And comprehend His spoken and unspoken words Conservative is what he is He knows when to not speak just a mere look says it all A look that can drive a woman insane A touch that makes a woman quiver A skin so silky and smooth He is every woman's Dream and Fantasy If I could comeback as anything, I wish it would be his tears... I mean what more can one want Other than to be conceived In his heart, Born in his eyes, Live on his cheeks, And Die on his lips!!!