"Party of Lincoln!", yet they're the party pushing racist, fascist, clearly anti-American bullshit from the deep South.
"Party of state's rights!", unless you're a blue state doing something they don't like!
"Pro-Life!", but really only pro-birth and pro-misogyny.
"Party of fiscal responsibility!", which has, in the past 20 years alone, decimated the American economy -- twice -- while exploding the debt and deficit with profligate tax breaks and wars of profit that both benefit their ultra wealthy donors and absolutely no one else.
"Party of personal responsibility!", except when they do something wrong, then it's "different".
"Party of Law and Order!", unless they're the ones breaking the law.
"Party of family values!", which elected a thrice-married, womanizing, lying, conman AFTER they heard him brag and joke about sexually assaulting women.
"Party of religious freedom!", unless you're one of those icky other religions, or want to be free of religion altogether.
Honestly, is there fucking ANYTHING that the GOP supposedly "stands for" that isn't total fucking bullshit? The answer is "no" because the GOP is a fascist party that communicates only in doublespeak. Fuck the GOP.