bubbles's blog: "thisngs on my mind"

I reached out for your hand You didn't seem to care; You can only reach so far When no one else is there. Others also reached for you Hoping to make you see; That we're just as important As he will ever be. We wish we could reach further But we are only so strong; We hoped your eyes would open So that you'd see you're wrong. It hurts to have to reach far When you once were so near; It's hard shouting out for you With our voices you don't hear. We wish you'd extend your hand And sense the friendship there; Knowing what our memories mean Showing us you still care. We realize you don't reach back Instead his hands with yours; You can't handle both the worlds So you close common doors. We're done reaching for the past You are now on your own; We hope he is all worth it, Without him you're alone.

Everyone walks around, with a smile on their face. A smile born from happiness, that no sadness can replace. I cannot feel happiness, because there is no on to share it with me. Without someone that wants to share your happiness, the people around you can only be deceived. It is possible to appear happy, when you really feel endless sadness. You can act perfectly normal, while the loneliness drives you to madness. To be truly happy, you need one of two things. And without one or the other, your heart will not sing. The first thing is so simple, yet it’s so hard to obtain. It is having a person that wants to share your happiness, even during times of rain. The second thing is simple as well, but it’s still hard to find. It’s believing you will soon have that person, that will leave the sadness behind. I have no one in my life, and do not believe anyone will soon make that change. So the happiness you see is a mere illusion, hiding the loneliness and sadness I try to cage.

An echo fades into the night, an eerie mournful sound. A shooting star disappears from sight, and I crumble to the ground. There is no life within this garden; my sobs are the only sound. I have poisoned the honeyed fountain where your love could be found. Dazed, I stare at the stars above, my grieving howls fill the night! Unintended betrayal of love has hidden you from my sight. I remember how it used to be when we shared our fears and delights. You are a treasured friend to me. How can I make things right? Feeling afraid, cold and lonely, I long to tell you how I feel, but you don’t want to hear me. The pain for you is much too real. Should I back away and build a wall and block away how I feel? Or, should I give you a call? We both need some time to heal. An echo fades into the night as our friendship disappears. How do I know what is right? How can I ease my fears? If I do call you again, would the old wounds reappear? I can’t stand to cause you pain. Hurting you again is my worst fear!