GETTING OLD IS ROUGH WHEN YOU START TO LOSE THINGS LIKE HEARING, MEMORY, ETC. AND THEN THERE'S THE ACHES AND PAINS. HERE ARE SOME EXAMPLES:
Three old guys are out walking.First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"Second one says, "No, its Thursday!"Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer." *******************************************
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You'rereally doing great, aren't you?"
Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'"The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur. Be careful.'" ***********************
An elderly couple had been experiencing declining memories, so they decided to take a power memory class where one is taught to remember things by association. A few days after the class, the old man was outside talking with his neighbor about how much the class helped him. "What was the name of the Instructor?" asked the neighbor. "Oh, ummmm, let's see," the old man pondered. "You know that flower, you know, the one that smells really nice but has those prickly thorns, what's that flower's name?" "A rose?" asked the neighbor. "Yes, that's it," replied the old man. He then turned toward his house and shouted, "Hey, Rose, what's the name of the Instructor we took the memory class from?" ***********
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulledhimself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
" No," he replied, "arthritis.