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Some of you knew her as Kept In Corsets, Shini, Whinnie...
She was my Italia and my Weewa.... my Whitney Jo.
Tomorrow is September 23rd 2009, marking the one year that our dear friend left us behind and joined the angels.
Do not mourn, she would not want that. Celebrate her memories, the good times, the positives.
True, she was taken much too young but as they say - the good die young, and she was truly the epitome of good...no... great.
She was a WONDERFUL mother to her son and a FANTASTIC friend to all she met.
So tomorrow, say a prayer. She'll be closer than you could ever think.
My heart aches because I cannot believe I have survived one year without my best friend, the one who knew all my secrets, the one who loved me no matter how much I completely fucked up, the one who trusted in me to take care of her son and love him as her own.
To my sister, best friend, lover, confidant, and angel,
I miss you each and everyday. But you know that. Please letting us know that you are still around and giving us hope for a more beautiful tomorrow.
I love you with all of my heart and soul.
You will forever be the tingle to my heat.
I love you, Whitney Jo. We all miss you dearly.
Always,
"Tragedie"
(I will not be here tomorrow. I will be in special places with people I know who will help me in this day of difficulty. That's why I wrote this today.)
NEVER FORGET! 1/29/87 - 9/23/08 ~ Je T'Aime Ma Soeur!!!!
I am offering 5 days of 100 11's (more if you'e like), a ticker, 200k, and pimpouts in my statuses for A11's!!!
If you're inrested, please leave a message here or PM me.
I'd appreciate it.
Love,
Bella
So I go to my PCP about 4 times a year. I go to my obgyn once a year. Everything has been fine lately with me. I recently lost a friend to suicide on Feb 7th. He graduated with my older brother, and is my mom's best friend's son. So, as we all know, after funerals.. I get sick. I've had a chest cold for over 2 weeks. I had gone to my obgyn for my yearly, so I can get my birth control script for the next year. They called me at 9 am and left me a voicemail.. "This is Joyce from Dr. Z's office... will you please call us back as soon as you can? It's not an emergency but I do need to speak with you. Thanks." I call her back... "Your pap smear came back abnormal. Your cells look abnormal also, which could signal a pre-cancerous condition. I also see that you got the Gardisil shot, but in your pap smear, your HPV status came back positive." I fought back the tears as I made the appointment for a colposcopy. I was such in shock by this news that I made it on a very important day... March 9th. My godson, Liam's, 3rd birthday. So... Now it's just waiting... I'll go for my colposcopy, and if my cervix looks abnormal, they'll biopsy a piece of my cervix for further analyzation. I know exactly who I got the HPV from... and now I regret having sex with him without a condom. My husband is very supportive and I couldn't ask for anything more! But I've been talking to many people who've had the same news and they've been okay. Let's cross our fingers and hope my guardian angel is looking out for me. Any tips, suggestions, anything? Please let me know. Thanks guys! [Special thanks to Derek *D-Rock* and Larisa *CherryBlowPopzz* for keeping me calm and talking me through my shock. Give them 10's and lots of love. I love you guys!!!]
Icarus and I celebrated our six months of marriage today (a day early, but we celebrated nonetheless!)
Only a month ago, we were contemplating separation and divorce due to our financial and psychiatric problems (including Icarus' horrific psychotic break)
Here we are, a month later... basking in the glow of each other's happiness. Our problems are not completely resolved, and the battles to stay afloat in our happiness are frequent, but we trudge on - together - as a husband and wife should.
He is my husband. He is my best friend. He is my lover. He is my rock. He is my confidant. He is my critic. He is my soul. He is my heart. He is my fantasy. He is my superman.
Best of all? He is Mine!!
On February 13th 2009, we took our vows and made promises to each other. "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? In good times and bad? In sickness and in health? From this day forward, as long as you both shall live?"
We both said "I do."
We may be young. We may be niave. But I know what love is. And my love resides in my gorgeous and loving husband, Ian.
Last night, we celebrated our anniversary of promising our hearts to one another with our dear friend Raige. She has not only stood by our side, but she has been the catalyst to remind us that we are meant for each other. He is the Jack to my Sally. I'm the Sharon to his Ozzy.
This blog is dedicated to my beautiful dear wonderful friend Raige. Without you, I may not be the happy, full of love, dedicated wife that I promised Ian I would be! And thank you for kicking his ass to be the loyal, sweet, romantic, caring, and loving husband he is!
Granted, our first 6 months have been challenging, but I know in my heart if we can defeat the ferverous demons of hatred this early in our young marriage, we will make it "as long as we both shall live".
I love you, Ian. I am so proud to be your wife!! Happy 6 months, my Bug. They went so quick. We've had our fights and our disagreements, but what doesn't kill us - makes us stronger... and we will always have our guardian angel (WJM) to remind us of that. I LOVE YOU, IAN.
Always and Forever,
Your Wife,
Kiera Rose
Today, I'm going to spend the rainy day snuggling with my hubby and watching movies.
I cannot wait.
I LOVE YOU IAN!!!
Your loving wife,
-Bella
Ian was released from the hospital on Friday.
We spent Saturday and Today together and it has been the best therapy, just watching movies and sitting in each others arms.
Although our relationship is strained, we still love each other dearly and will do anything for one another. We are working on ourselves separately, and each other together.
He has apologized profusely for what he made me see, and I have apologized for things I have said about him (in anger about what happened).
5 months of marriage, and we're going to be okay.
Maybe not today, not tomorrow... but together, we'll do it and we'll get through it.... If we can survive what happened last week... we can survive anything.
I love you, Ian... so very very much. I'm so happy you are my husband and I am your wife. Though shit is hard and crazy right now, we'll get by... no matter what. Our angels will get us through. I LOVE YOU, BUG!
-Bella
So, my husband decides to break a mirror and attempt to slit his wrists while I'm sitting right beside him.
One of the most horrific things I have ever seen, seared into my memory.
I took him to the hospital and they admitted him immediately.
I love him so much. But I will never forgive him for what he did to me today. The traumatic sight, attempting to pull the broken glass away, only for him to be stronger....
Why Can't I Be Okay?
Happy 5 months of marriage, Ian. Yeah right.
Can you stop the fire?
Can you stand to fight her?
You cant stop the fire,
you wont say the words.
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
Maybe someday you'll look up,
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:
"Isn't something missing?"
You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?
Whispered:
Can you stop the fire?
Can you stand to fight her?
You cant stop the fire,
you wont say the words.
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out;
"Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?"
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?
And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
I'll wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something.......
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
-----------------------------------------------
Bella - Putting The Sin In Single Since 7/8/09.
Ian and I separating until October 31st (our 2nd anniversary of dating) and then we will see if we will continue on with our marriage together or if our paths are heading different ways indefinitely. I am very heartbroken, but at the same time relieved. He is going through major psychiatric issues and I think it is best for both of us that we are doing this trial separation.
I will love him until the day I die, but if he is not ready to handle marriage, I'd rather be divorced at the age of 21 than to be unhappy with my life married to him.
Bella's back on the market, boys and girls. Show me some love.
-Bella
You and me
We used to be together
Every day together always
I really feel
I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And it it's real,
Well I don't want to know
Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Our memories
They can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands
I sit and cry
Chorus
It's all ending
I gotta stop pretending who we are...
You and me
I can see us dying ... are we?
------------------------------
Ian has asked me for a separation. I'm not sure if it's due to my putting him in the psychiatric hospital. I don't know if it's his meds or lack thereof.
I've been married for only 4 and a half months, and I'm failing.
I love you, baby.. Please, please...snap out of it.
-Bella
As most of you know,
Ian and I are rapidly approaching our 5 months of marriage.
Unforunately, Ian had a breakdown and I took him to the local psychiatric hospital. We waited for 7 hours... and even when I left at midnight, not even one physician helped him yet.
Please pray for my husband and send good loving energies.
We don't know what's wrong, but he's definitely not being the man I married.
I love you honey, so terribly much. Please get better soon. I love you.
Forever,
Bella
