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So, we have an arrangement with my half-sister-in-law (husband's half sis, same mom, different dad) Tina. It involves her buying groceries and then paying us cash because we help her with our food stamps (we have 3 people at our house - my father in law, my husband, and i) but Tina has her fiance and her 4 children (plus my mother and brother in law).
Tina lives 45 minutes away from my husband's house. She wanted us to meet her yesterday at the Wal-Mart nearly an hour away so she could go shopping. I told Shelley (my mother in law) that I would like to meet at the Giant Eagle in the shopping center directly between Tina's and our house. Tina said she'd go to the Giant Eagle 40 minutes away. I give in because we had already bought food and we needed the cash for cat food, toilet paper, and other household items.
My father in law is absolutely furious about how much of a fucking bitch Tina is being (Steve (FIL) hates Tina...long story but Tina and Steve don't get along) so Ian (hubby, duh) and I go.
We get there and meet up with Tina and Shelley. They are taking FOREVER. Ian says "Ya know Tina, we didn't wanna be up here that long." Tina snaps back "I'm doing your stupid wife a favor by shopping here!!! This shit is too expensive."
Ian goes BOOM. "Kiera is getting fucking NOTHING out of this. She's doing this for YOU so you don't have to drive your lazy fucking ass the 45 minutes down to Cori when there's a Wal-Mart RIGHT FUCKING THERE. How dare you insult my wife!!! She does more for you assholes than you ever do for her!!!"
Tina and Ian get into it while Shelley and I desperately attempt to shut their fucking mouths (we're in the middle of a crowded grocery store)
Tina abandons her cart and goes to leave. Shelley and Ian chase after her after Ian tells me to watch over the carts. Shelley calms Tina down and Shelley and I make Ian sit in my car. While I'm trailing holding back anger and tears, I can hear Tina talking shit on me to Shelley. Tina and I have never gotten along. She thinks I'm stuck up and I'm too good for everyone else, meanwhile, I married her brother who has never had a steady job and has gone to jail. I love him even though he's had many faults, and I love my father, mother, and brother in law even though they all fucking take me for granted (Ian and Steve don't at all... Shelley and Josh do)
They finally finish and my hubby and I drive the 40 minutes back to our town and go to the small store there to pick up the things we needed.
----------
Here's the icing on the fucking cake.
Steve gets anti-anxiety medication which when they were living together, he would share with Shelley (ya know, husband and wife. Ian and I do this as well) They haven't done it lately since they've been separated.
Today, Shelley gets wind that my father in law got his medication.
I had already left my husband's house due to the fact that I have to work in the morning. Shelley calls my phone "Hey, are you still with Ian?" "No, I'm home." "Shit, I know they don't have any minutes but I need to tell Steve that TINA IS BRINGING ME DOWN TO GET SOME OF THOSE MEDS."
So now as I'm writing this, Tina is driving Shelley to my husband's house because she's a greedy fucking c-word.
I have officially disowned my mother-in-law and my brother-in-law because they are nothing but lying, greedy, asshole, user, junkie, druggie, low-life fuckers. They only call me when they want something.
Favorite part of yesterday? Shelley goes "Tina worked from 8-3, she's so tired, Kiera. That's why she doesn't want to drive." "Well, Shelley, I drove to Slippery Rock to drive my sister back up to school, helped her pack and unpack and now I have to do this bullshit and Tina's tired?" "Well, I'm sure Tina would rather do that." "HAHAHAHAHA. Bitch."
Fuck Shelley. Fuck Josh. Fuck Tina. I hate that I won't be able to see our 4 beautiful nieces but I'm sick of being used for my car. They don't love me... they love that I can drive.
My family is me, my husband Ian, and my father in law Steve. And those are the ones I will do anything for!!! They truly love me and appreciate me in their lives. Fuck the rest. They're all I need.
What were you doing at 11 last night?
Passed out in bed. Yes, I lead an exciting life.
Do you think you and your best friend will be friends in 10 years?
Absolutely.
What could you eat any day of the week and never get tired of?
Cheeseburgers and mashed potatoes.
What's the craziest thing you've done?
I've done quite a few crazy things.
Someone knocks on your window at 5am, what do you say?
My parents: If you're at a 2nd story window WTF
At my husband's: It's Jerry looking for beer.
At my best friends: It's Jamesbro.
Funniest thing that happened in the last 24 hours?
Making fun of Steve at work.
Do you have any plans for the weekend?
Working. Joy.
Let me guess, your last incoming call was from the opposite sex?
Would be the hubby!
Would you kiss anyone you have texts from in your phone?
I do!
Do you find drinking unattractive?
Nopers.
When was the last time something bothered you?
Today
Do you know how to work a computer well?
Yes
To who did you last give the finger to?
My brother
Is it more common for you to follow your heart or your mind?
My heart
Six months ago, can you remember who you liked, who was it?
My husband.
Do you like to hold hands?
Yeah
Anything embarrassing happen today?
No... well, besides this hell of a goose-egg I have on the side of my head :(
Would you ever go on a game show if you were offered?
Hell yeah.
What does your phone do when it receives a new text?
Sings "Champagne Cocaine Vicodin Adderol Nicotine Caffeine Percosets Haldol Krishna's Rollin on Ecstacy.."
Yup, you read that right, my phone plays Otep Noose and Nail METAL.
Has anyone ever done mean things to you while you were sleeping?
Of course. But I can't say I didn't deserve it!!!
Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
My husband, Ian and my best friend, Shawn.
Would you rather be at the beach or lake?
Lake
Last thing you spent money on?
On Demand movies.
What are you doing after this?
Takin more relaxers and tryin to lay down.
Your song of the week?
Ain't No Rest For The Wicked
Have you ever cried from being so mad?
Yeah
Are you happy with the choices you've made?
Most
I bet you miss someone, huh?
Abso-frickin-lutely. He best be a good boy while visiting Raige!
Would you rather be forced to eat 100 bananas or 100 apples?
Apples
Have you dated the person you texted last?
I dated him for about 2 years then I married him.
Is good grammar attractive?
Sure
Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?
Yes
Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?
Yes
What is today's date?
January 2nd 2010
Who was the last person to call you baby?
My hubbydubbles!
Has anyone ever sang to you?
1am, New Years, laying in bed with my husband, holding hands, singing together. Nothing better :)
What is your favorite color?
Crimson
What color are your eyes?
Green/Grey/Blue
How tall are you?
5'1"
What do you have planned for tonight?
Sleeping!
If you could have one wish right now what would it be?
For my Hubby to be with me instead of Raige!! (jealous, are we Bella?? No.. cuz he's mine!)
When is your birthday?
13th of April in the year 1988
Do you want to get married and have children one day?
Already did the married part. Would love to have 2 babies with my honey.
Who is the 9th contact in your phone?
Alytastic (exactly how it is in my phone, haha)
Ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
Yep
If you could spend more time with someone you used to be very close with, would you?
Ya
Could you go a day without eating?
No
Did your parents force you to go to church or let you make the decision?
Force
What are you excited for?
One year wedding anniversary!!! February 13th :)
Did anyone see you kiss that last person you kissed?
Lots of people have seen me kiss my hubbybutt!
Do you still talk to the person you last kissed?
Duh. Waiting for him to call me, actually!
Would you date an 18 year old at the age you are now?
I'm not dating anyone ever.
What are you listening to now?
Some bad cop show on cable... listening FOR my ringtone...
What woke you up today?
My Mum
Would you take someone back if they cheated on you?
No
Have you ever dyed your hair?
Yes
Who was the last person you have a missed call from?
Hubby
Where was your default picture taken?
My bed at my parents house.
How many windows are open on your computer?
2
Anything you really want?
Yes, my hubby! (Fu-world? VIP, more blings, ect... lol)
How many pillows do you sleep with?
Like 20.
Can you have more than one best friend?
Yes
What was last thing you drank?
Tazo Green Tea
How many pets do you have?
Hubby's : 3 cats - Baby, Tigger, Cheeba
Jenilyz's : 2 dogs - Zinky, Sasha ; 1 cat - Pacino ; 2 fish - Sharon and Ozzy ; 1 snake - Ka ; 3 birds - Koo, Babygirl, Robert
What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?
Hot chocolate
Who last texted you?
My honey
Who did you last text?
My boobear (STFU. You get married and still be this in love a year later, fucker)
Do you know anyone whose pregnant?
Quite a few people (Dear Nikki, have Reilly already! Love, Bella!)
What do you want right now?
For my Bug to call me so I can say Ni ni... then for him to come home so I can cuddle up and fall asleep in his arms :)
I have a wonderful family. I have an amazing husband. I have fantastic friends. I am a lucky girl.
Tonight, I suffered from 2 seizures while in the arms of my husband. We're unsure of the cause but I thank my lucky stars that I married such an intelligent and loving man. After my seizures, I slept for a few hours, comfortably settled in his warm and strong arms... protected, protective.
He is my beacon of hope. He is the brightest star in my night sky. He is the love of my life.
People may say I'm crazy for marrying at 20.
I say it's the smartest move I ever made. I can't imagine my life not being his wife and him not being my husband. We could have dealt with being engaged for a few more years, but our love is something beautiful... magical, almost.
He's smart. Handsome. Loving. Talented. Sweet. Caring. Kinky. Adoring. Creative. Romantic.
And best of all? He's mine.
"I loved you then, I love you still. I always have, and I always will."
I love you forever and always, Ian. "Take care of my heart, I've left it with you."
*UDDUP*
Always,
Your Wife,
Kiera Rose ~ "Principessa Bella Scura"
Okay, here's some ground rules. If you pass these, propose. If you don't... DENIED.
-Must have a salute.
-Must have YIM
-Must be able to spoil me
-Must be able to surprise me in different fu-ways
-Just because I'm your fu-wife does not mean I will get naked for you
-Must remember I am married in real life
-Fu-marriage is mainly to benefit both parties pointswise
-Must have a sense of humor
-Must be above level 18
-Must talk to me outside of fu (yim other ways)
Other details will be worked out when the right fu-fiance(e) is accepted.
Read these rules. Comment so I know you read them. Then propose if you think you're worthy!
-Bella
Today, my love was released from jail and we were reunited... ON OUR 9 MONTH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!
It was such an amazing day!!!
We found out he was put in for bullshit reasons and that the douchebag that reported 28 people turned in false reports, pocketed the buy money, and lied to the police.
KARMA IS A BITCH.
I thanked my lucky stars that my husband is free and we got to celebrate our 9 months of wedded bliss together!!
THANK YOU MY ANGELS!!!
I LOVE YOU, ICARUS!!! WITH ALL MY HEART!
Always,
Bella
As most of you know, my husband has been incarcerated since October 29th. It has been a long two weeks without hearing his sweet voice (besides voicemails I am overjoyed that I had saved) and seeing him since a few days prior to his arrest.
It's been especially difficult due to the fact that October 31st is when we officially got back together. We've been together since December 14th 2006, with only a minor break.
I've been trying to go on as usual, but he is always on my mind.
Today, I'm heading down to the county jail to see the gorgeous man I love through a pane of glass. And I will finally be able to hear his voice... and to tell him myself (not through a bondsman or a counselor) that I love him and that I'm here for him.
I told him when he got into trouble in July, that if he were to be put in jail again, I would leave him.
I can't do that. Not when he needs me the most.
But while he's in there, we're separated in every facet of the word.
This is my first time ever going to a jail, especially to see someone I love. I'd seen cells and whatnot at the local department, but my uncle works there.
This is county jail. I'm just so happy they finally released my hubby from the mental health unit because there are so much more visiting hours.
So I'm scheduling my classes, then heading downtown for 2 hours (1 hour to wait til visiting time, then 1 hour visit).
Wish me luck.
I know you won't read this, but I love you baby. I love you with my entire heart.
"I loved you then, I love you still. I always have and I always will."
Always and Forever,
Your Wife,
Kiera
You attempt to use the bathroom quietly and politely (parents have connection closet to said bathroom) and you smack your head against the wall and it takes 5 minutes to get off the toilet and return to the computer.
And this entry took 3 minutes to write. With decent grammar, punctuation, and everything.
YOU'RE SO JEALOUS.
Night.
Hi, Bella here.
It's 2 am, and I just served myself my final drink.
I've drank a half a 5th of Calico Jack rum and root beer. In less than 2 hours.
I'm listening to DJ GroundZero's first show back and everyone is getting a bonus cuz I have a few people watching my drunk ass on cam, attempting to eat pop rocks, running into my own bedroom door, my father checking on me (my parents discourage drinking alone) and BLAMING IT ON FUCKING POP ROCKS. "Daddy, I dropped my pop rocks... everything's okay." "But I heard something go bump." "I hit my head on the desk." "Are you okay?" "yeah, I"m going to bed." and yes, I'm writing this drunk. BE PROUD.
I got autos running and I'm fucked up and I can't feel my fingers but they're still doing what my brain commands them Spike is recording our conversation -- FUCKING BRON JUST BUZZED ME.. FUCK YOU SEXYPIE. -- Anywho... I told Spike to save our convo... I really want him to be staff in GFR cuz that kid is fuckin AWESOME.
I'm so happy. But... then again, I'm drunk so I really can't feel anything.
Ironic? I think not.
Well.
Maybe.
Are you still reading my psychobabble? Fuck off. I'm wasted.
LOVE YOU GUYS.
-Bella
My dear husband is incarcerated for reasons I do not wish to list. To get him out of that hellhole, I'll have to collect 2,500, which is completely out of my reach.
I feel like a hole has been punched through my chest and anything that reminds me of him just increases that gap and slowly, it's killing me.
I have been by his side through every last ordeal and I am not abandoning him now - but with the difficulties of maintaining an inmate/significant other relationship - I officially dubbed us separated.
On our one year back together. I can't see him. I can't hold him. I can't even tell him I love him.
His bondsman called me, relaying messages between us two... and I told him "Please... please tell him I love him with all my heart." through broken words and choking back tears.
I told him if he was to be put in jail again, I would leave him. I am powerless. I can't help him. I don't know what to do. I am burning in the fires of regret for not putting my foot down.
I could've saved him. But, I didn't. And look where we are now.
My heart just absolutely aches. Halloween, my favorite holiday of the year, joyous because it is when my love and I officially reunited in our love together.... and he's gone.
I will do my best to trudge on... feel him through the clammy class... and tell him I love him.
I'm so sorry I didn't do anything more.
I'm so sorry.
Baby, you are my entire world... and it is hell without hearing your voice. How I yearn to hear "I love you, baby." spouted from your sweet lips. Though we are not together, I LOVE YOU with everything I am and everything I have. I will do everything in my power to help you... even if it is writing you a letter. I miss you so much. I love you with all my heart.
"I Loved You Then, I Love You Still. I Always Have, And I ALWAYS WILL."
Forever And Always,
Your Wife,
Kiera Rose
I am lost.
Desperate.
Desolate.
I've lost myself. I've lost the grasp of all that I have ever known and loved.
Am I close? Is the cease beckoning? Or do I fear what I embrace in its entirety.
My angels. My darling angels. My Laina. My Whitney. My Chonni. My Hollie.
What is to become of my husband? Devoid of my love and devotion, will he falter in his resolve or as Romeo and Juliet join me in the unknown?
I fear I am losing touch with myself. Reality is a lie. I burn with hatred of a thousand suns and not one of would offer a hand or a listening ear.
I dying to stay afloat. I am dying. Yet, if I am gone... will I be missed?
I want a future. I want my daughter. I want my Jaydienne Jo to know and to love her mother. I want to know my child, my beautiful daughter that my husband and I will have created to join Laina.
I want Lianna to know that I loved her more than anything on this earth. Nothing is more precious than her glowing smile, her gorgeous personality, and the wonderful little girl she has grown up to be.
My husband. My darling sweet loving husband. Through our hardships... his psychosis, my diagnosis. He has stayed strong. He has been my pillar of strength, and slowly, his foundation is crumbling as I continue to falter, not by will, but by nature. If I pass on, will he join me? Will my Romeo take his own life because he will not live another day without his beloved Juliet? If I pass, I wish to be in his arms.... to take my last breath to tell him... "I loved you once, I love you still. I always have, and I forever will."
I do not fear death. I fear the voids I will leave in the ones that I do love. My wonderful family. My dedicated husband. My fantastic friends.
My will is to live. But I am afraid, as Juliet, that I shall falter. My Romeo shall see his lifeless love and join me in death. I do not wish that. I want for him to be happy if something should ever happen to me.
"The words have been drained from this pencil - Sweet words that I want to give you.
And I can't sleep. I need to tell you goodnight.
When we're together, I feel perfect. When I'm pulled away from you, I fall apart.
All you say is sacred to me. Your eyes are so blue, I can't look away.
As we lay in the stillness, you whisper to me.... 'Baby, Marry Me. Promise You'll Stay With Me'
Oh, you don't have to ask me... you know you're all that I live for.
You know I'd die just to hold you.... stay with you....
Somehow, I'll show you that you are my *Night Sky*,
I've always been right behind you...
Now I'll always be right beside you...
So many nights, I've cried myself to sleep.
Now that YOU LOVE ME, I LOVE MYSELF.
I Never Thought I Would Say That.... I'd Never Thought There'd Be *YOU*"
Amy Lee - "You" ~ Dedicated to my heart, my soul, my life, my everything, my husband, my Ian.
You are my will to live, and we will live happily ever after.
Forever and Always,
Your Wife,
Kiera Rose
